Beginner Questions/ Help Appreciated Wife new to flirting with others

My wife and I are considering having her flirt a bit with any interesting guys who might approach her as she has a beverage alone at a bar. I will be nearby to enjoy their interaction, but for now we are not planning to go further than some flirting, dancing, light touching, kissing, ... not sex yet... but we have questions as we move toward this.

What kinds of rules do others use for this activity to make sure both of us remain comfortable with it?
"No Brainer" rules? Rules we might not think of since we are new to this?

If one of us is uncomfortable, how should we communicate that without being too obvious?

My wife is not intending to lead a guy on and then abandon him, but more hoping to simply flirt back a bit if he flirts with her. How can this be done in a good natured way that doesn't hurt or upset the gentleman if it doesn't end up getting him where he hopes to go with her? How can she disengage from him nicely when the time comes?

How should my wife go about 'flirting' if a guy approaches her? (This is something she has never done before ... ever... and she feels a little out of her element)

Any info on the best kinds of places for this activity?

For now we are thinking to go any further than this it would require the exact right guy, and the exact right time, and the exact right place. So we are taking first steps here and we will see how it progresses.

We will be in Key West for a conference in a few weeks. Anyone have ideas about a good place or plan for this in Key West?

Thanks for sharing any info or experience you may have in this area.
JK

I guess we are all new at this, not just my wife and I.
For some reason I was thinking others here might have done this before and have some advice for us.

If anyone later needs to learn from our experience I will post what I can here after we try a time or two.

In the meantime, if someone happens along with some experience in this kind of thing any advice would be much appreciated.
JK

You are trying to hard. Just go have fun. If she is alone at the bar while you watch from somewhere else it will all take care of itself. Just tell her to talk to whoever talks to her.
HIT1969

Thanks for the reply, and clearly the good advice. I can over complicate anything if I try hard enough!

We actually haven't tried anything as of yet, so not too too hard so far. I don't think it would be wise to enter such a situation without at least some ground rules in place. We have talked about this some of course, but I was just wondering what ground rules and info others might be able to share. I keep thinking someone must have been in this position before and have some insight they can share.
Again, thanks for taking the time to reply!
JK

If she is totally new to this and she hasn't shown a desire to fuck others in the past you really do need to go slow. It may be possible that she will find it an exciting fling to try while on vacation especially after a fun night at the local watering hole. Otherwise I would say to join a couple adult web sites that has cams and dating like maybe swingers Lifestyle dotcom. There you cane get her to cam in the chat rooms and maybe make some friends that she will feel close and comfortable enough to actually meet in real life.

As to a place to visit while in the keys I would put "Garden of Eden" on my list. It is a clothing optional bar and might be fun even if you don't get her fucked while there. Who knows what might happen. There is nothing more dick stiffing than seeing your wife take another's dick for you

Thanks for the info and views. Anyone else have experience or recommendations?
Thanks!

our only time we set up a meeting at a lounge with dancing. seems we started slow,wife loves to dance and its an easy way to get her relaxed with another man getting his hands on her.. bonus for you is if he sneeks his hands down for a grope or a kiss
gigelo2000

Jimmy,

Lauren and I were in your position 10 years ago -- and here are a few things to consider.

(1) Does your wife have a fair amount of sexual experience with other men (presumably from before you were married)? If not, she should take it slowly. Lauren had been with quite a few men before we were a couple and so she was comfortable with intercourse as soon as she found the right man.

(2) Go to a bar that has the type of men that you would like her to be with and that has dancing. It will help your wife relax and get into the mood.

(3) If your wife only wants to flirt and kiss a guy -- that's fine. Let her go slow and give both of you a chance to ease into it.

(4) Is your wife an exhibitionish? Are you a voyeur? I loved to watch Lauren in a bar with a guy -- even when she didn't want to fuck him.

(5) Is your wife the daring type? My ex-wife, Beth, and I went to a gala fundraiser at the Smithsonian Institution about twenty years ago. It was a black-tie event. Beth met a man at the event who had access to the administrative offices. They fucked during the party, and I only found out about it after we got back to our car. Would you mind if your wife took the opportunity to fuck a guy and you didn't know?

Do you have any specific questions?
pb

Sometimes all the pre-planning in the world can fall apart at a moment's notice. My wife first started the flirting thing at a party where there were quite a few people we didn't know. It was a wild event and lots of getting high. We became sort of separate in our attention in that there was a cutie that appeared to be coming on to me and chatting me up, so I lost track of my wife, who was talking to a couple of guys nearby. It was a huge condo with 4 bedrooms and a large balcony overlooking the beach. Wall to wall people. The girl I was talking to on a sofa wanted to go to her car and get something to smoke and asked if I'd go and escort her since the parking lot was very dark. Well I ended up getting a BJ in the parking lot, but when I returned to the party I started to look for my wife since I had not seen her in at least 45 minutes. I was a while in finding her and when I did she was in one of the bedrooms on a huge water bed with 2 younger guys. Imagine my surprise, since we had not discussed anything like this!! And then one of the guys (not knowing she was my wife) says to me: "This one's super horny, man. If you want some of this I already fucked her. You can fuck her when this guy (referring to the other guy on the bed who was pumping her at the time) gets done." She had fucked them both without any protection!! Wow, what a way to get introduced to this crazy lifestyle! As I said it was all kind of 'surprise, surprise!!'. My wife was afraid I would be angry, but I was so turned on by the entire event watching her with those guys that I just showered her with sexual attention. Of course I never mentioned my little adventure in the parking lot since I didn't think she could handle the jealousy, but her actions topped mine by a loooong shot anyway (much to my ultimate happiness)!!

The "no brainer" rules?
If sex happens- a condom must be used.

Other than that- it is what you are comfortable with: You and your wife need to talk. How far are you
willing to go? Making out? Oral? sex? Anal?

Establish limits and stick with them. Keep in mind, in the middle of the club, or in the car outside, you will want her
to do more, and she will want more. Establish "extreme limits".

Where to try this? depends on you. Are you "club goers/dancers"? or are you quiet evening at home types?
(if so- a bookstore would be a better choice than a bar).

I was in your position last year. It wasn't difficult, because I had my wife hook up with her massage *********.
(look around in your daily life: Is there some one she sees daily/weekly that she is attracted to?)
Now, it's pretty regular, but there is always something new to try. I'm trying to hook her up with a woman, and a
black guy.

There's some excellent advice here. the one thing that really stands out is 'Don't push her too much at first'! When she's happy she'll fuck another guy, with or without you being there. It's also an evolutionary thing, once she's happy with fucking outside of her marriage she'll naturally up the ante, multiple partners and BBC are a natural progression, girl on girl too, just give it time like anything else.
I was fortunate inasmuch as my wife was already a confirmed BBC slut when we met, she just carried on with my full support.