Journal - from traditional sex life to ???

This thread is my journal about my attempts to get my wife to make me a cuckold.

I have posted questions to this group asking for ideas on how to talk to her about it, and have recieved some great suggestions, but want to keep everything documented under a single thread.

It may never happen and if it does, it will most likely take a long time to get there. As this is a real life account, I will only post when something significant happens. That means it may be days, weeks, or even months between postings.

I would enjoy any comments, suggestions, and encouragement thoughout this process.

Thank you,
iwmwtcm

Wishing you the best of luck. For those not familiar with your situation, maybe post your efforts to this point. I hope to be able to provide any help we can.

This is how we ended up watching porn:

A few months ago we were having a particular passionate lovemaking session. We get like that whenever there is a lot of kissing. Anyway, we ended up with me on my back with my wife kneeling between my legs. I pulled my legs up and wrapped them around her (kinda like a reverse missionary). She was thrusting her pelvis into my ass as if she wanted to fuck my ass. It was very hot and passionate. Later, after we had finished and were cuddling, I told her that I was imagined that she doing me with a strapon. She indicated that it could be arranged.

A few days we were wtching one of those "Talk Sex" shows with that older lady who gives sex advice to callers. On every show she reviews a sex toy. On this particular show she reviewed and highly recommended a prostate vibrator called the rude boy. My wife suggested I get one. I used a coupon code for Adam and Eve that I heard on the radio (I will tell about that in another post) that gave me 50% off on any item, free shipping, and three free XXX dvds. So I ordered the rude boy (expensive, about $75).

After about a week later my wife asked me if I wanted to try watching the dvd's! I didnt even have to ask her! We watched them and she was very wet when we made love afterwards. She came within 5 minutes of me giving her oral sex which is amazing as it usually takes her 15 minutes or longer. Amazingly, the videos were anal sex videos which she is not interested in.

By the way, we did end up trying the rude boy a few weeks ago and it wasnt as good as I was hoping. I just felt like I had to crap. Afterwards she mentioned that we should get a strapon.

This morning we had another passionate lovemaking session. We used the Liberator Ramp (last years Christmas present) which I highly recommend. Afterwards I asked her if she was serious about the strapon and if she was doing it for me or for her? She said she wanted to try ot for both me and her! I guess I'll be placing another order to Adam and Eve and getting some more dvds. I am praying for some with MFM scenes.

Sounds like a great start. My wife and I have been watching porn together before we were officially dating...back when we were friends with perks. Back then I was still for the most part single and had a wide variety of porn. One in particular I noticed she liked was Anabolic Video's Gangbang Girl 18. In it a guy, is sparring in a ring with another guy (maybe a black guy)...don't really remember. The one guy gets knocked out and tied up in one of the corners...then the girl is gangbanged in the ring. Black and white guys and two white girls.

I bought her toys and we watched a lot of porn and played...and fucked. I brought the fantasy up to her early on, but she was a no go on it...well untill recently.

Maybe when ordering some dvd's...accidentally order a cuckold video. When they arrive, say "what the heck is this?" Play it off, and say "well, lets watch and find out" See what she does and says.

Ive thought about doing that but I havent picked out the dvds. They were thrown in for free when I placed the order. She doesnt really like porn (or should I say she doesnt want to like it) and wouldnt want me to start buying porn. Also, the titles on porn movies are usually fairly descriptive about what its about.

But that is an interesting idea. We ordered some anal lube to go with the rude boy and it came with a set of 3 Bree Olmister dvds. I think I'll wait for her to suggest watching it and them hope for some MFM scenes. If I notice that she gets gets turned on again I am going to suggest renting a threesomes flick.

Thanks again for the advice. I have followed your thread and am honored to get advice from someone who has been where I am.

This morning my wife and I were talking about a charity walk we are going to on the morning of October 31. Its a fundraiser to raise funds for the family of a little girl with a brain tumor. Anyway, since the walk is on halloween, I joked that I should wear the dress that wore as a halloween costume a few years ago. She laughed. Then I said that maybe I should wear it the first time she took me the strapon for a true role reversal experience. She laughed it off and said something like "I never thought about doing that". She acted like she wasnt really interested but afterwards we just sort of sat there without talking for a few minutes. I know she was thinking about it.

That would be interesting, wouldnt it? We'll have to see.

In the past my wife...then girlfriend/friend with perks...used a couple different dildos on me. Now she wants nothing to do with it. I assume she will come back around. Its funny that she (my wife)...when it came to cuckolding me, was an absolutely not...to a hell yes, and cant wait to fuck him. The dildo thing was an ok, if you really want me to...to I don't want to...and then from no condom play to...ok next time if I can, I will bring one home for you.

Its a back and forth on everything except the fucking the neighbor...if thats the only constant...thats the one that counts.

I think your idea about dressing as a woman is a fun one. She should dress as a man. She could even dress as a dominant lesbian who is to later fuck her sub girlfriend. Have her later that day, or night, fuck you in costume. Sounds like that kinky door in her mind is open ever so slightly...just have to keep it open. Sounds like you are starting to have more fun. Keep it up.

Yesterday we were driving to a memorial service (4 hours drive) and we were listening to COSMO XM satellite radio. It was a show called "Guys Uncencored" where 4 guys just sit around talking about guy stuff. At one point they talked about whether or not they would do a threesome. They all pretty much agreed that they would if it was two girls and a guy but not if it was two guys and a girl. I found it interesting that all they cared about was their own fantasy and their own pleasure. They werent as concerned about the girls pleasure. I feel just the opposite. I want to treat my wife to a MFM in order to maximize HER pleasure. I could have used that discussion to ask her what she thought about a MFM but I didnt because I hadnt worked it all out in my head yet. Maybe I'll bring it up the next time we have sex.

This file has been posted before but I like it so much I had to post it again. It is an audio file by Isabella Valentine made for guys who like the idea of their wives fucking other men. It starts out very tame but quickly gets intense. It will help you deal with the emotional effects of being a cuckold and if you are on the fence, it will make you REALLY want your wife to take on a lover. Ive listened to it at least 50 times. Make sure you listen all the way through. It starts getting intense about half way through. Enjoy!

Attached file: luvincuck.wma

deleted

What did you delete?

I have an idea...does your wife know what a creampie is?...the one we all want to eat? I read a story somewhere...a man and a wife went online to look up how to bake a creampie. When they searched...they came across a creampie/cuckold type site. At first he was "what the hell is this", the wife kinda the same reaction...but then they got curious together..."wait, lets take a look at this"...

Maybe start out with something like that.

Nice recording.

Allen, the deleted post was a duplicate of the post with the recording.

Hmmmmmmmm...
Interesting idea about doing an internet search for how to bake a creampie. I will have to think about that. Offhand I would say that would be best done after an MFM. I think she would not be very receptive to something like that right now. Great suggestion though. My mind is already thinking...

Has anyone ever done this?

The last time I made love to my wife... well, lets just say I didnt bring my "A" game. It seems I have been masturbating a lot to cuckolding fantasies while spending time on this site. When me and my wife ended up in bed later on, my erection seemed to go away during the middle of sex. I felt like I was fucking her with a wet noodle.

I am expecting her to be dead set against cuckolding me (when I finally tell her about my fantasy).

I was wondering if consistently masterbating before sex over a period of weeks or months might be an effective technique to making her start thinking "Well, maybe it might be nice to get fucked by another man with a hard cock once in a while".

What do you think?

Well, I can say that I masturbate a lot. And no it has not caused anything like what happened to you. What it has done though, it is...I believe the reamister I cum so quick. Don't dwell on it to much...or it might become a mental block in your head and cause this to happen often.

If this keeps up, it might lead her to thing that its her...and that you don't find her attractive enough to keep it up. I would start introducing small amounts of the cuckolding into your/her everday life. Mainstream movie rentals...does she read? Go to a book store (after doing research), and "accidentally" find a book and say "hey, this book looks interesting". Tell her you saw a review online somewhere and its supposed to be a good book...

Your wife might be a tough cookie to crack, or she might not crack at all. I hope she does...for you and her.

Good advice Allen. Thanks. It was just something that crossed my mind.

I have tried looking for mainstream movies with a cuckolding aspect but have not had much luck. Animal Instinct is one that I am going to try. Unfaithful with Diane Lane and Richard Gere was awesome. I couldnt relax for two nights after that one. Can you suggest any others?

She does read both already has a stack of books in the cue. I read a book on fantasies and I marked some pages for her to read but so far she is not interested. I think she is afraid she will find some fantasies she likes but for some reamister she is uncomfortable with having fantasies. We made love this morning and she got very arroused dry humping me while pretending to be wearing a strapon. We talked about that again and she agrees she wants to use one on me.

I guess I should just continue to take it slow, get the strapon, and hopefully let the conversations go toward a threesome. Thanks again. Any movie recommendations would be helpful.

A movie called Emmanuelle? I think thats the name. I am not sure though. I picked up some books from Amazon with some cuckold themes. I would say keep with the strapon, and letting her dominate you that way. She does have the seeds of domination...and I think with time and gentle prodding...she will enventually cuckold you.

Check out this link on youtube. Its a clip of the movie I mentioned above.
The hyperlink is visible to registered members only!

Thanks Allen. I will put that movie on my list.

Yesterday we watched another porno (2nd one in almost 18 years of marriage). It was called Kaydens Crossfire. We only watched the first two scenes before we were interupted by my stepmister calling to see if we would watch our grandmister for awhile. We enjoyed making fun of the fake boobs, ugly leading men, and lousy acting. I will post my thoughts on that in a seperate thread.

An interesting and exciting development: we were going to watch the rest of the movie this morning but my mister stayed home from school sick. Bummer because I dont know when we will be able to find an empty house again. But we did manage to lock ourselves into the bedroom for some fun (we dont have a tv in the bedroom). Anyway, I cant even remeber how it came up but I told her how much fun it would be for me if she were to make me wait a week before having sex. I also told her I wanted her to tease me the entire week. We have talked about this before. One of the differences between men and women is that mens orgasms are better and more intense the longer we go without but womens orgasms are less intense the longer they go without.

She looked at me like I was crazy. "I thought guys dont like to be teased", she said. I told her I wanted her to tease me all week long. I also told her the only thing I was worried about was that I might not be able to keep from masturbating. She asked how she would be able to know if I masterbated and I told her I would just be honest with her.

My plan is to maintain a hands off policy for the week, let her tease me, and then see if my orgasm is any better next Friday. Sometime during the course of this I want to bring up the idea of getting a chastity device. The idea has always entrigued me but I am not sure if the reality will be as good as the fantasy. This is going to be fun!

My wife just asked me "So, I can do anything I want to you this week as long as you dont cum, right?"

"Thats right" I told her. She just grinned and said "Ok, if thats what you want!"

I hope she enjoys teasing me as much as I am going to enjoy being teased.

This morning my wife and I were joking around and I mentioned that I could use "a little lovin". She laughed, pulled out the calendar on her iphone and looked at several dates. "Wednesday night is out, Thursday night is out. Looks like Friday night works. Nothing for you until Friday!" You have to unserstand, she's never talked like this before. I told her i loved this game. Shes definitely enjoying this. She told me that she is going to throw her best stuff at me this week to tease me. I told her to be merciless.

iwmwtcm, keep this one going. My wife and I are quite a ways past where you and yours are, but I am enjoying watching this progress.

My wife and I started with some minor D/s; she didn't like whips & spankings, but quickly found that tease & denial was a great turn on for her. She soon presented me with a CB6000. She loves the power of control over my erections and orgasms, but she was feeling a bit neglected in the mean time (this was supposed to be my denial, not hers). Now I am only released from my cage when she is between boyfriends. She is having so much fun, she has two active boyfriends now- it looks like it'll be a while before my next release. I do get to watch and clean up afterwards. I love it!

Thanks for the encouragement. I think a boyfriend is way out in the future for us, if ever. But she is having a lot more fun with this than I expected. How did the CB6000 come into play for you? Did you suggest or did she? If it was you, how did you approach it? And can you explain how the idea of taking a lover(s) come about? How were you able to convince her that you would be ok with it? And how did you (and her) feel when another man actually fucked her? What was it that she liked? Did she think her lover was better at fucking her or was it the taboo and novelty that she liked?

My wife has been sick the last few days and so not much teasing going on.

Shes starting to feel better so I hope she starts. I think she is a little uncfortable about doing it so I need to encourage her and let her know I am enjoying it.

A mixture of good and bad.

My wife is feeling much better tonight. I mentioned that since she was sick for a few days and wasnt up to teasing me that maybe we should move our next sex date from Friday to Sunday. She said that it was up to me if I wanted that and I told her no, it was up to her. She said that she might just crank up the teasing tonight and tomorrow.

The bad news is that I was telling her about the XM Radio COSMO program I was listening to. The program is called "Get in Bed" (which is an awesome show BTW) and they were having wives of military men call in and tell them how they handled sex when their husbands were deployed to Iraq. One lady called in and said her husband gave her permission to get sex from other men while he was away if she wanted to. When I told my wife that she got a disgusted face and said "that is so wrong". I tried to make light of it by saying that as long as they were both ok with it, it was ok. She sadi there was no way she would ever give me permission to do that and she wouldnt expect that I would give her permission either. I told her that I didnt want any other woman but her. She was obviously upset about it and I know better than to push it.

I think I will have to approach this sometime after watching porn. She is much more open to new ideas after porn.

I just hope she doesnt try to bring it up later. I will either have to deny my fantasy or fess up. It could get ugly. Any suggestions?

My own experience... summarized for brevity...
I brought up the subject just enough that she knew something was up. Finally I told her that the idea intrigued me for some reamister that I didn't understand any better than she would. I said that I had no conscious intention of pushing her towards anything like that and even hesitated to bring it up. Further, I explained, I really wasn't at all sure I was okay with it REALLY happening anyways, but wanted to clear the air so at least my puzzlement was shared. She really wanted to understand, too... and maybe really did.

On rare occasions, and only on those rare occasions when she'd take holy water, she'd bring up the subject. But only in hints that were mischievous teases. Like once at a club she went to the bar to get refills for our rum and cokes and she flirted with the bartender. She told him that she and her husband were having a "special" celebration tonight, and he made the takes extra strong. She told me that she gave him a great look down the front of her dress as she leaned over the bar. She was watching for my reaction, then reached naughtily for my crotch to see for herself. I'm literally laughing now because I just remembered now that some woman saw my wife do that, and she licked her lips and winked at my wife as if to say "go ahead, suck it." Funny the stuff you remember... she took it only a little further, but seemed delighted in my pleased but blushing response.

The issue remained like this for a few years. The final word from her was, in essence, "I could never really do it." But if takeing, she could sure use it as a way to toy with me, especially once she realized just how sincere I was.

But it really came up rarely. Then basically not at all. Then one night she literally woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me she had decided to take me up on my offer to let her explore sex with someone else, that she had already met someone, and had already made arrangements to meet them the following day. Talk about an abrupt wakeup!

We had a lot of talking to do, but wrote out our "understanding" of it in outline form to be sure of how we wanted to handle things, and things became a real adventure very quickly after that.

On a final note- and I say this with some hesitation- some of our best and most productive "all night talk sessions" were under the influence of illegal stimulant substances (this was before we had kids, and our kids are all adults now). They are NOT worth the risk today in my opinion, but it's unfortunate that couples can't undergo that type of talk therapy legally and under clinical supervision. We talked on a level of permisteral absolute honesty that almost no relationship ever really achieves, but were frightened by the use potential and dabred only a few times before backing away slowly. But that "therapy" was a huge factor in establishing some communication comfort early in our relationship.
Be the different drummer.

When it comes down to it...Time and place means almost everything. My wife was very against cuckolding me at first. Getting very upset with me for bringing it up sometimes...yet sometimes she would tease a little. That littel bit of teasing gave me hope to think that something may happen.

Your wife expressed dislike in the Cosmo Radio thing, but I think the subtle hints can go a long way. The biggest thing is that when you do hint, remember to assure her that in no way do you want another woman. It is only for her to explore. I really think you are doing a great job on this. You may never get her to cuckold you, but, never say never. The gentle, loving, taking your time to get it...is the best way to go about it.

Thanks everyone. This cuckolds brownie is nerve wrenching sometimes.

Luckily she didnt bring it up last night. So maybe she put it aside or will bring it up later. I guess her reaction isnt really all that unexpected. She is very monogamous in her beliefs. I have to remember that she has never been exposed to ANY loving cuckold material like I have. I think the first time I read a cuckold story I said to myself "what the fu.." and then wondered why I was aroused.

This is why I want to find a loving cuckold porn movie as opposed to an in-your-face cuckold offense movie. WHY HASNT ANYONE MADE A FILM LIKE THAT?

I think she knows something is up. There were a few awkward pauses in the conversation. Allen, you are right about making sure I am not interested in another woman. The first comment she said was "theres no way I would let you do that", even though I didnt say anything about that. I wonder if that is what she thought I was refering to? hmmmmm. If this comes up again soon I will make that point right up front. NO OTHER WOMAN FOR ME.

I feel like Im rambling.

Tonight is sex night! I talked her into denying me for a whole week (it wasnt hard to do, lol). This week has been hard for me, though. I have masterbated repeatedly but have always stopped short of coming.

I think I'll try to talk her into doing it again next week. She was sick part of the time so she didnt get to tease me very much. I want her to get into that! I think she will enjoy it.

This morning she told me she was shaving her pussy bald for me tonight. Its been a few months since she did that. I love it when she does. She usually has me do it for her because its difficult for her.

I love fantasizing that someday she will ask me to shave her in preparation for a lover. After I shave her she puts on a sexy dress that we bought just for him. The doorbell rings and she asks me to go downstairs to answer the door. I invite him and make small talk until we see her at the top of the stairs. We watch in silence as she comes down the stairs - she is so beautiful! She gives him a hug and a short kiss on the lips. She turns to me and says "dont wait up". As they walk out the door she stopps and tells him to go ahead and that she'll be right there. She turns to me and, without saying a word, stares into my eyes and lowers her panties past her hips down to her ankles. She stepps out of them and hands them to me with a teasing grin. "I dont think I'll be needing these tonight" she says! Then she walks out the door.

Oh cuckolds brownie! I hope I can make it until tonight!

<< Then one night she literally woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me she had decided to take me up on my offer to let her explore sex with someone else, that she had already met someone, and had already made arrangements to meet them the following day.>>

Sounds to me like she still has some misgivings about it, and can't talk about it unless she was really psyched herself up for the talk. Why wouldn't she just wait until you woke up in the morning? I'm sure you're happy for the change, but jeez!

Well,
Sex night didnt work out. A couple of nights ago me and my wife were joking around and I said something like "well, we can wait until Sunday if you dont want to do it on Friday". She said "ok, if thats what you want". then I said "no, its whatever YOU want". She didnt say anything after that so I didnt think much about it. It turns out she thought that meant we were going to delay until Sunday.

Bummer. Today (saturday) we are completely booked so it have to be Sunday.