iaskwhy
Member
Posts: 7
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When I first met my wife, I was attracted to her because she was the 'kinky girl.' She's wear boots that clung and climbed her legs, tight bodices that revealed pale, soft cleavage. She loved to dance and dance dirty, and while we were dating her dancing partners were many. We had somewhat of an open relationship; she was bi-sexual and had a girl lover who I was also friends with, (yes I once had a chance a threesome, fetishd up and said no -- god I'm an idiot!). She said since she was relaxing with this girl, I was free to enjoy other partners as well -- I told her I wasn't interested in relaxing with other girls, and contrary to what one might expect, this wasn't due to some cuck inclination -- I thought if I was faithful, she'd be faithful as well. Well, it worked.
Now seven years into marriage, and my wife no longer even considers herself bi-sexual. Before you ask, no I'm not the creepy husband who is egging her on to have sex with a woman, it was just something I found out through intellectual discussion with her. Her sex drive seems almost nil, and I think a large part of that blame is on my shoulders -- I haven't been the most attentive lover these last few years; I should note I'm completely capable of satisfying women in bed, in my case it's just been sexual laziness. My bad. Totally, my bad. I know many married couples get sexually lazy (and she certainly has as well!), but the fact remains that the lower her sex drive remains, the smaller chance I'll have of fulfilling fantasy. Aha! Now we begin to get the point.
Of course I fantasize about being cuckolded, else why the hell would I be here? My fantasies have progressed further along though, and in considering the cuckolding reality, I've realized something. If I want the reality to be a healthy, rewarding situation for us both, I've got to end my sexual laziness, please my wife in bed, and get her sex drive in gear. She was sexually active with multiple partners (she practiced safe sex, mind you!) when we met, I feel confident she could be again. Only, I would prefer it to be with a male.
Why do I consider it necessary to please her in bed and kick start her sex drive? I mean, if I stayed lazy enough, it might get kick started by another man! Right? Well, yeah, but you see that may not be the healthiest way to go about it. I feel for the fantasy to become reality, and stay a reality, my wife also has to be happy with me, my emotional support, and our sex life together. While the thought of her looking outside our marriage to get some because I'm not giving it to her is certainly appealing from a fantasy standpoint, it's not from a reality stand point. How long before she comes to feel that I'll never be intimate with her again? Therein lies the problem, and hence the solution; if you want your wife to make you happy in bed, make her happy in bed.
So the problem becomes, how to kick start her sex drive? Here, I'm totally at a loss. I've tried making advances with her, putting forth that extra effort to please her, but she's rarely in the mood -- I've talked to her about it of course, and she says honestly that she's tired, or not in the mood; I know, I've used those same excuses with her in the past. No, she's not doing it for revenge; she's truly just not in the mood! I've got to get her sex drive in forward motion again.
Comments, suggestions, feedback, additional considerations or responses to mine? Let me know!
-iaskwhy
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