Wife at convention

If I had never had that nasty girlfriend back in my earliest 20's, I probably wouldn't even want this. It's like you said, once you've had it, it's very hard to not have it again. I miss the days when she'd come home around 3am, and reassure me that nothing had happened, but she'd make me eat her out, and it would be so obvious that she'd been having sex. I never understood it back then. But thank God for MBC and this website! I couldn't reach her last night on her cell, but I just talked to her and she said she just went to dinner with some other people in her group. She didn't even have a cocktail. SIGH

My wife called me just a few minutes ago. The only real news I have is that after the big banquet at her convention last night she said she went out and had a couple of cocktails. I tried calling her about midnight and she didn't answer her cell. I asked if she had made any new friends and she just said no. She also said she was calling from her hotel room. While we were talking I heard a cell phone ring as if it was right next to her. Then I could hear quick footsteps and a muffled hello in a mans voice. I asked her what that was and she claimed she didn't know what I meant. I described what I heard and she claimed she didn't hear anything like that. I probably blew it if she did have a friend in her room, or if she was in someone else's room. I said it with excitement, but she could of interpreted it as anger or jealousy. If, and that's a big IF she did have a friend, that would be all I would really want to hear is that she was enjoying a friend she had made. I guess I'll be checking her panties when she gets home for any signs of playing. I'm so frustrated right now!!!

Absolutely no signs of evidence. I think I'm doomed to be a wannabe.:mad:

I feel like im in the same boat with you. A few weeks back my wife was all ready to go. She even said she would video her liaimister for me.when we were having sex she would talk about how she couldn't wait to feel her first new cock in well over a decade. Then a few days later she decides she doesn't want to do it. She just likes the fantasy but says she never could actually go through with it. I know that we have to enter this hand in hand if its ever going to work so for now I have to shelve the idea. I'm stuck with the fantasy.
The one thing I didnt like from what you were saying kmac is that it sounded like she was lying to you. I hope that's not the case. Have you talked to her about this?
fender

Damn this roller coaster ride of emotions!!!

I didn't really talk to her about the noises I heard when she got home Fender. Mostly because when I heard them I asked what was that, and when she said she didn't hear anything that was pretty much the end of that. If I pursue something like that it never ends well.

Roller coaster ride of emotions. That about sums it up. At least a roller coaster ride of libido. (sigh)

We were having a take the other day without our mister being around. Something (I can't remember what) came up about her having a Black Basketball player and I reminded her that it's all about her. If she could find pleasure with one of those I would back her up and support her all the way. She had her hand in my face saying "enough".

(sigh)

My wife had an encounter at a hotel while away on business. She tried to avoid talking about it with me before it happened, but fessed up after the fact. I think most women adhere to society's rules and don't like to feel "slutty". I suspect your wife feels the same way. It's very difficult to convince a woman that just because she has slutty feelings/intentions it doesn't mean she's a full on slut.

Not that there is anything wrong with full on sluts either!

I can understand your frustration. Since she already knows that you want her to, and she can most likely see your frustration with this...now is a time to reassure her of your love for her. Be carefull to not let these emotions develope into anamosity tward her. The best you can do is ride the roller coaster until you or she stops the ride. Hopefully she takes you for a new ride...

Good luck.

cplnearottawa and Allen. Thanks to both of you. I get your point about not wanting to appear "slutty". I've tried my best to erase that stigma by reassuring her that it would be about her pleasure. But society does have it's rules doesn't it? And Allen, you're one who knows this roller coaster better than anyone I suppose. I reassure her every chance I get when it can be meaningful. Nothing's worse than a day full of empty "I love you"s. (sigh) I will continue to love her and support what ever decisions she makes.

If you have time before you go home today, go to bath and body works, get some scented/stress relief candles. Then go to Victorias Secret,

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Get some of that body wash, pour her a bath and light a candle. While the water is pouring into the tub, squeeze some of the body wash into the tub to give her a scented bubble bath.

I got the same stuff for my wife, the tub smelled great, and so did my wife when she got out. My wife surprised me by wearing some of the lingerie I bought her, she joined me on the couch. It didn't take long for us to get into it on the couch, in front of our large picture window. She asked me to close the blinds because people can see in...I told her..."its 10:30 at night, traffic is almost non existant...besides, who cares..its naughty"

It was a good night. I think tonight should be a great night for you and your wife. Take the cuckold thing, put it on the back burner. Tell your wife, its all about you and I. This is about us.

Make it happen my friend.

Allen, do you mind if I refer to you a The Yoda for this website? That's *******er advice, BUT she isn't into baths at all! She's hardly into anything these days except being angry. She's a cancer survivor. (breast) and after she found out she had that, had it removed, and survived all the treatments (chemo and radiation) her libido has gone straight to ZERO. She's still a beautiful woman. The part where they removed the lump is barely noticeable to me. She has some long term effects of the lymph nodes being removed. (numbness) But she just doesn't really have a sexy bone in her body. I miss that terribly! The GOOD NEWS, while having a Martini on Friday, somehow the subject of HER PLEASURE was brought up, (I'm sure it was me) I mentioned longer and thicker might give her pleasure where I fall short. SHE SAID "short and thick". Now I'm not quite who or what she's talking about here. I'm short (about 5 1/2 to 6") but I am not THICK. So I don't know if there's a silver lining on the horizon, or if she's just indulging my fantasies. I do my best not to pressure her into sex. (we missed our date Friday) But I hold out hope that some day, for some reamister, her spark will reignite the flame that used to burn so hot with her. Thanks to everybody for your encouragement and suggestions. (keep the faith brothers)

Somehow need to find a way to get her to open up and settle with her emotions. Sounds like she needs to talk things out. Does she have any girl friends to hang with? Girls from work...etc?

She seems to be holding in emotions that is eating at her from the inside. At least thats what I get by you saying she is angry a lot.

Keep up the support and do not waver on showing your love for her. Do things for her that she does not ask for, surprise her with dinner, and even though she is not into baths, pour her one anyway. I am pulling for you and hope that she opens up for you, and for her.

She has a few friends. None from work that she hangs with. She's going out with one of them on Saturday. The only thing is that this woman is even more reserved than my wife. The odds of them hooking up with someone are almost astronomical. She has another friend that she occasionally goes places with, and she is recently single, but she's so stinking religious that if they found two guys, she would shame my wife is she appeared even remotely interested in one of them. I keep hoping she finds a single friend at work who is a slut, and brags about how good a huge cock feels. I want my wife to desire that. I can't give her pleasure through intercourse any more. She still turns me on, and I know some bull would get hard looking at her getting naked. I stay positive. All it takes is one guy that turns her on. It might happen, it might not. (sigh)

Its friday, and the clock says its almost beer-30! You never know, sometimes those church going girls can be very naughty.

Have any of my friends here ever used a "girth enhancer" on you dick? And if you did, was your woman happy with it? I'm thinking about getting one and trying it out. I see it all as good. If she likes it, she'll hopefully start to orgasm again. If she complains that it doesn't feel "natural", maybe, she'll decide to try the real thing? What's your opinions on this my friends?

I have one of these. My wife always said that "he" was not really longer, rather thicker than I am. So I bought one of these and she now says its very close. Works pretty good for us. Make sure to use lube if your wife is not really wet.


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Thanks Allen! I'm going to give something like that a try as soon as we're done with the remodel we're currently working on. She made friends with another single gal, and they were "supposed" to go out last weekend, but it never happened. I asked her if she wasn't going to see Ann, and she just said that nobody had got a hold of each other. Maybe some day. We're going to invite her out for our summer party. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Hopefully the new gf is a bit of a "free" type girl.

If those two can get out and play on a regular basis...maybe your wife will open up a bit. My wife is going out for a bachelorette party a couple hours away, she is staying over night with the other girls. I doubt anything will happen, but hopefully they all get a little takes and slutty...hehe.

Do you know anything about Ann?

K McDonald
Sorry to thrust my nose into it but I think, regarding your thoughts, that you are very much obsessed with this being betrayed wish of yours. I can understand what are you going through because I experienced that, once, long time ago.
My advice, if a can give any, is to simply let it go. From my experience, things happen when they have to happen, sometimes despite of our efforts.
You told us parts of your conversations with your wife and I can assure you that she is ready to cuck you if she didn't yet.
But have in mind that you may never ever know a thing about it. Women are particularly smart in the art to let men discover only what they want we to know. You already let her know exactly what you want for you both. Now it's up to her do it or not and mostly, let you know or not what she did or didn't.
I'm afraid that if you keep pushing her, it can lead to the end of your relationship.

Best regards.

Well, I've kind of given up on this. I would still LOVE for this to happen, but I'm just not holding my breath any more. Thanks for all the support you've all given me! If anything positive develops I will most certainly update this blog. (doomed to jacking off at the thought of it all)

Most here are...

Still pulling you something for you.

We live in the same state. Yes it's hard to wait but believe me it is worth it. I have always wondered what it would be like to help another man to seduce my wife. Maybe if you have a friend that you trust could help both you and your wife to take that next step. I'm here for you.
watcherdoit4fun

Well I'm taking off for a week the second week of August. My wife will be here alone. I'd love to be able to hide a mic with an auto on. Even a hidden camera. But I'm afraid all I'd see is her watching some damn foreign film. (alone) Yes, I've dropped the subject with her. Next time she brings up anything about it, I won't even act excited. Sometimes I think she does things intentionally just to piss me off and be contrary. Maybe some day she will awaken, and if she does, I'll be here to lick her clean. Until then, I'll lurk here, read about others who have been more successful, and, , , ahem, , , , , jack off. WTF!

Hey if you would like me to try and seduce her for you, I will be happy to try. In fact several times before me and the wife got into this lifestyle I thought about getting one of my friends to try and help me out. Then one day I found out it had been happening right under my nose. Now we are out in the open with each other and things are great with us. Good luck!
watcherdoit4fun

For what it's worth, I learned the power of language with my wife...when I was going on about her acting more "slutty", releasing her inner "slut", the result was very negative (she wasn't having any of it, and was in fact offended)...when I started using the word "naughty" instead (in the same contexts, ie, her screwing someone else), the result was MUCH more favourable (we're still not all the way there, but she now enthusiasticly plays along).

Keep us updated , I wish you the best.

I can't believe I have this many people reading this! Thanks to all of you. She hasn't been in the mood since my August vacation. Chemo and radiation has just sucked all the libido out of her. Sigh (very heavy sigh)

A nice bunch of flowers might cheer her up. Go get some carry out of her favorite food, a nice movie, and sit next to her on the couch for a nice evening together.

I agree spend time with her and just enjoy her company. It always helps to place your partners needs before your own. Then magically things workout better for you. Good luck, I hope she is doing better and you both grow closer.
watcherdoit4fun

Maybe this thread is dead, I dunno, but here's my 2 cents...

Seems to me you are trying too hard. The best thing is to make her believe she wants it, not you - after all a cuckold does not condone; he subjects and has to accept.

First thing you got to do is that SHE gets excited and turned on with these fantasies: try telling eachother stories during foreplay and/or sex. Tell different stories and find out what makes her wet. Once you know this evolve the stories gradually(!) to domination and submissiveness, with you being the submissive and her being in the dominating role (mind you there's a lot of grey between vanilla and S&M). Condition her to get aroused by Dom/sub. If she already likes the Dom/sub feature you're half way there. Then slowly introduce cheating in the stories as a dom/sub feature: she is exercising her dominance over you by humiliating you in your manliness by cheating on you, but you as a submissive are forbidden that. If you still roleplay, use it in the roleplay => get her to say that she and her husband have an open marriage, but that he's not allowed that by her!

When she is comfortable in this role/fantasy-stories, on her birthday/marriage-anniversary/cancer-free anniversary surprise her with a gigolo and you yourself retreat. This is a special gift from you to her, because she has been brave in overcoming her struggle against cancer, been a very good wife, putting up wih your constant nagging to have/change/power/adjust her sexlife to your own fantasies. This is purely a gift for her and her only, as she deserves it. Make sure she grasps the meaning of this gift: it expresses your love and respect for her and her whole being and it is a reward for her accomplishments; refusing this gift will be offending the good intentions and denounce her good influence and accomplishments. You leave her alone with him and tell her that you will be back in 2 hours. You give her a mobile phone and tell her to call you if she needs anything during these 2 hours. You pay the man - not in front of her! - and leave.

Afterwards, the two of you will go out to dinner at a nice posh restaurant where you will not once bring the gigolo up, nor will you accept her talking about it and you will not ask her about it - as it was a gift and experience for her and her alone. You whine and dine her, maybe even go to a real 'women'-movie (like the sorts of 'Legends of the Fall') and then go home. During all this time you only lovingly hold her, kiss her (no french kiss), respect her and make her feel like a total lady, without having her feel like you want to have sex with her. Just total respect and a fun time for her!

When you come home, you have nightcap and got to bed together and snuggle al lot, but not have sex. The next morning you make her breakfast (on bed?) and ask her if she had a wonderful time yesterday (no details allowed!).
Leave it at that and return to your regular life and not bring it up for a whole week. If she wants to bring it up, tell her you and her will talk about it the next weekend, during a nice weekend elsewhere in a nice hotel, preferably a spa.

There you talk about the whole adventure, what she remembered, how she felt, liked/disliked, what turned her on or off and finally if she would be willing to do this kind of thing again. If you or her is very discomforted doing above at home, do it during a week of vacation, with you planning everything in detail up front - including the gigolo - not a foreign country, but a region where no one knows you or your acquintances as you want her to be relatively relaxed and not worried. The advantage is that you can agree to what happens during our vacation, stays at our vacation - nothing comes out and is not mentioned again - except for the next weekend (at the spa) unless it was a total fiasco. At the end it comes to this: make it all about her - and not you or your fantasy. Help cultivate her fantasy.

Hope this helps and gave you a few pointers you can go on with.
Good luck.
Dozo
P.S. Keep us informed!