Fantasy slowly becoming a reality

When making love to my wife, she would always get turned on when I brought up the subject of another man fucking her. I found out a few months ago that she had been seeing a guy I knew from work and I eventually confronted her with it. She admited that she was fucking him, he was a much better lover than me and had a bigger cock. I felt betrayed at first but I was so turned on that I told her I could cope with her seeing him now and again. She seemed to instinctivly know that I liked the idea and started staying out till late. She knew that I would be waiting on her returning from her lovers bed.

The first time it happened she asked me if I could smell anything on her hands, I could, it was his cock I could smell. She kissed me then let me run my hands up her thighs to touch her panties, she knew I was so turned on and it seemed to arouse her. Her panties were soaking with her lovers cum and I rubbed the crotch into her pussy. She kept asking me if I wanted to see her being fucked by him and she asked me if I would lick her after he had cum. I said yes. She then asked me if I would like to taste her pussy juice on his cock and I again shocked myself by saying yes. At that point she told me to pull down her panties and lick her. I don't know why I did it but I held the panties to my nose and the smell of cum on them was overpowering, I put my tounge out to taste them, it was sort of salty and slimey. I then got my head between her legs and started licking like some sort of lap dog. She kept asking me if I could taste her lover and I told her yes. She asked me if I wanted to taste more of him and I said yes again. At that point she squeezed her pussy into my face and I could almost take the sperm which was now running freely from her pussy.

I realised that she was controlling me, cuckolding me and I was loving it.

The problem now is, I am loosing her, she wants to be with him and is now in the process of leaving me. She only lets me lick her now and and again and that's only when she's had a take or two with her lover. She often does not come home till morning which is only to get changed and go to her work. I'm left rummaging through her laundry basket to find the cum stained panties which I lick and sometimes wank into.

I feel like a broken man, who at one time was this strong man in the relationship and I'm now reduced to licking cum filled panties and wanking. Even that will stop when she leaves.
Jim_3