Seeded

I have been cucked for 12 years and that is almost 15 years ago.
We splitted. Don't worry it had nothing to do with the lifestyle,
Never had a sex life with my gf I have right now.
As a kind of friends but almost no sex.
The last monthI slowly opened my sexual feelings, telling her small pieces of my past.
Started with cleaning, cooking and washing making slowly jokes about to be her sex slave.
My gf is prude.
A couple of hours ago I told her she can fucks she wants and all of my past.
Right now she is relaxing.
She was almost in shock.

If she's a prude...... expect her to be heading down the road in the morning.

Good girls can be turned to the dark side.....but a real prude has tits of ice that can't be thawed.

Good luck!
Cuck who loves a creampie.

Yesterday in the morning we started the day as usual. Just like nothing happened.
Last night she read a story about cuckolding. We talked a lot. No sex of course.
One of her first boyfriends seemed to fucked her brains out, He cheated so she kicked him out.
But I can feel she loved it. She told me she met 2 years ago a man. She felt good after spending the night with him and others.
They talked, nothing more, they walked to the train station. He took her in his arms. She felt comfortable with him.

Nice and slow, nice and easy. Take your time and hopefully things will come.

Ok.
What happens the last 2/3 days.

First a little back ground.
I have been there and I am a wanker. I wanked a lot and still do.
As long as I can remember I was attracted to sex/porn.
It started when I was young with sounds. Trying to find and listen to couples having sex. Today I still love unaware recorded sounds from couples having sex with a background story.

My Ex, many moons ago, was a slut.
Of course I had never heard of cuckolding in that period of time.
Just as many of you I have the same problem, small dick and coming too quick. I have never been able to satisfy a woman.
After I started my relationship, as I can remember the first 2/3 years, I never heard the alarm bell.
On big parties she dissapeard sometimes for a hour but so what, let her talk and have some fun..., right?
Of course I was a disaster in bed. But with some toys, love, humor, good looking and my sixpack-belly I had a good relationship..., right?

Still even today pieces of the puzzle felt and are falling together and I know I still miss a lot of them. For example I think my older brother fucked her as well.
Why didn't she wanted to go to the direction of a tent, on a camping we were, the next day where there was a guy we met the night before and the 2 hours she needed to shower that night?
Why didn't she answer the phone when I was one week gone because I was working off-shore?
She has the right to have her own friends going out and have fun when as was working night shifts or was gone for a week..., right?
The first time I caught her was on an evening she invited a male friend at our home. We need all food, so I went to the take-away but I realized I forgot money so I went back.
I opened the door and walked inside. There was nobody in the living room. But I heard sounds. Just like my heart stopped. I can't descripe the feelings I felt. I listened for a short time and quietly
I took some money and went out. An hour later I was back again and they were sitting on the couch watching TV. Just like nothing happened. Just after "dinner" he left. I felt bad, sick but I didn't told her.
The day I confrontated my Ex that I suspected she was cheating on me we cried. Her dad died too young, around 1 year before I met her. The relationship with her lady became strong.
And guess what? Her dad: small dick and coming too quick. Her mom was never sexual satisfied. And that was exactly she didn't want her to live that kind of life.
This was difficult but we agreed and she had "my permission". We never talked about it. I knew it was happening, I needed to accept it and that was it.

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Almost 15 years ago I met my current GF. Clever, faithful, beatifull, high educated but prude. A towel around her breast after a shower, curtains closed, no pussy eating etc.
I started a new life, moved with her to her home country, needed to learn a new language and worked hard and still do.
Time flies I thought this was the best way to live my life. But I kept looking back in the past. I have been active on cuckold forums the last years and met some cucks or wannabees, started a small place in the old drop.io.
We discussed and shared experiences. Cum on pics etc. For some of the men I met online it worked, but it can go terrible wrong as well. Cuckolding is not a game and I think it is a really bad idea to use cuckolding to repair a marriage or relationship.
The last month I was thinking a lot. And made the decission. To plant my own seed.....

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The last 2/3 days.
I told her (almost) all.
She read about cuckolding and I created a directory on our laptop on the Desktop named "cuckolding". I putted a story in this directory and (and this was for me the most risico full part) some caps from a forum member named "heavenlymr". I knew she wouldn't like them but I needed to confrontate her. The story was OK for her but has "problems with the captions" Too confrontating but I knew that already.
She "hates" the sound of people fucking, she "hates" the dirty books in a petrol station, she "hates" woman clothes sexy and is jealous, redy jealeous.

And since the last three days all HER puzzle pieces are falling together from the last 15 years.
Why I don't have problems she has male friends and to let her go out with them. Why I am not jealous, she thought it was a lack of love.
Believe me. She has been in a emotional rolling coaster the last days.
SHe couldn't believe her ears when I told her the day my Ex came back from the gym and I wanted to have sex but she in first case refused.
When she agreed and I "penetrated" her I felt something strange. Her cunt was slippery and slimy wet. And I realized I was fucking her cunt just after a real man dumped his load.
She asked me what I felt. When I told her I loved it and it made me redy horny her eyes became big and looked at me with unbelieve.
But than you turn everyting around she said! A man must be jealous, angry and kick her out, was her reaction. Normally, yes, I said. But not when a man is a cuck I said.
And of course the standard problem. She asked if the meaning was that I want to have sex with other women as well. No, I said. Because I can't please a woman.
Why all those T-shirts and tissues with cum she constantly found in the bed room..... She knows and knew I am a wanker for years but we never really talked about it.
She told me she saw some video clips on my smart phone a couple of weeks ago when she wanted to check time and I forgot to close it.
I asked her if she was shocked. She said no, not really, many men seems to look at porn....
I have no idea what is going to happen. But one thing is for sure. I am glad I told her.

Today I saw the smile and look at her face I missed for many years. She is happy I told her.
Yes, we are in our midlife and I told her the only thing I want her is to enjoy life. And if she wants, she can let a real man fuck her brains out.
It is going to be very difficult to find the right lucky basterd because she is very selective and critical.
Last night "we" had sex. I made the decission not to wank for one week and I told her. As usuall she was masturbating herself to an orgasm. It's was a pretty strong one.
No orgasme for me. And of course there is a reamister for this (ask yourself).
She may start talking about it again. I told her my secret and now it is up to her.

Two nights ago when we were talking in bed she asked me. Who want you me to fuck?
That's up to you I told her. She told me if it is going to happen I don't want you to be there.

In the start of juni/july she is going to start, with other people, to rent a small place to work. Artist, starters, muscians etc.
Soon she is going to write the contract.
A small room and because of our economic it is necessary to share with somebody else.
Yesterday at dinner I asked her with who, in a way she didn't realized my fishing.
A man from around 35 years old. She already met him. Her first impression is good, a quit guy with humor.
Of course is this guy already in my mind, but she doesn't know. And that is better for now.

And no, she will never become the slut I had once and there is no reamister to.
Let's see what isgoing to happen. It will take time. I will try to make her horny once a week and if that works I will step back.

Even if it looks good right now it will take time. Maybe she is going to spread her legs or our life is going to continue without.

I just came back from some work in my garden.
And seeded again.
This time flowers.

I don't know how to feel. Happy or worried.
This morning after I waked up and made coffee my girlfriend came home with our dog.
The first thing she said was "Did you wanked last night?"
I started laughing and said almost proud, no.

Yesterday we talked. She wanted to talk. She told me to talk on a regular base as well. She doesn't want this to dissapear in our daily routine.
I think she realizes what's going on. She realizes this is not a fantasy. She realizes this is not popped up in a man's mind shortly.
We are going to use the directory on the laptop to come closer to eachother. I asked her to delete parts in this directory she dislikes.
We talked about men in general. I asked her if it was ok to create an account and start slowly looking who is hanging around. With a soft voice, yes...
She suggested to go downtown. Only to look at men in for example a bar. And to discuss who can, maybe, become the lucky bastard.
I think she is almost sure, IF it is going to happen, I am not allowed to be there.
I told her for me it's OK, and I prefer it, she is going to spread her legs in my own bed.
With fair in her voice she asked what about our neighbours?
We live in an old appartment with thin doors and walls.
I told her all of us are out between 7-15. On the second floor under our bed room is an holy wateric living, almost 60 years old. So, no big deal.
That's interesting why she asked. When we have sex I am almost soundless and she as well.
So? Is she afraid she is becoming a little screamer (again?) when a real man is pumping her pussy well?
It seems to be she is loves the idea not to be afraid (anymore) for other women.
And yes "we" had sex again yesterday. She mastrubating sitting on me. She was wet in one minute. For me, no orgasm.

She is very emotional, always has been. She asked me if it was OK to talk with her best (female) friend if she needed it?
I said, yes.
Things changes quickly, maybe too quickly. Her girlfriend is pretty often in our house.
Let's prepare for the day her girlfriend is coming over and is looking in my eyes.......

Good Luck!
Cuck who loves a creampie.

It's time to give some water.
I asked her to clean-up the "cuckolding" directory but the caps are still there.
And again "sex". She in a couple of minutes wet and I leave without.
I think I need to change a couple of caps in the directory. More confrontation.....

Yesterday she went out with one of her female friends.
A picknik in a park. She listened after their problems and fights.
Listened what it is, to live with a man who is always jealous, checking a woman, doesn't want her to go out alone, is afraid.

She came back home with a big smile.
And realizes she can do what she wants.
She was standing behind the window when I was working in the garden.
Showing her breasts, shaking her body, making fun. 1 week ago she would never do this. Afraid somebody would see her.

This morning, just before I left, I asked her to read a letter and answer some questions on the laptop.
I am still looking after some good caps and stories.

She starts enjoying this.
Me too......
Again.

Your seeds seem to have take root. This sounds like it is a great start to a wonderful journey. I am looking forward to your updates! Thanks for sharing this.

Last night I got my reward after one week not jerking off.
She told me to lay on my back and started stroking and sucking my "dick".
"So.., it makes you horny if I will fuck another man", started she teasing.
"So.., you want me to fuck another man.....", she continued.
I said, "Yes" and cum directly.

I am going to slow this down, it's just like I need to watch a boomerang, expecting backfire soon.

She realizes this is serious.
Without doubt she is in an emotional war.
Asking herself if she can disconnect her feelings for me while another man is entering her cunt, start fucking her and whispers "The wrong things" in her ear.
Asking herself questions what the relationship is between "to need" and "to miss"
Asking herself if she still can escape and keep this a fantasy.

Yes Allan, the seeds have take root. Very small ones.
The only thing I can do is wait, watch, water, take care and start looking for weed.

Just a short update.
Life goes on. One day my girlfriend came home. She talked about a young couple with a little young in a pram.
She saw the "look" and the "lock", happy with her new "life". The freedom she has.
A couple of days later she took me to our bedroom. Sitting on her knees she took down my pants and started to suck my little willy.
She started a role play. Told me she was in a park sucking a strangers dick while I was allowed to look at a distance. Is this what you want?, she aske me.
After 30 seconds she started talking softly, I am cuming.., I am cumming... I thought it was a part of her game but when I looked down I saw her hands between her legs.
She was masturbating. In less then a minute she came......I have never seen her cumming that quickly in 15 years.
More then a week nothing happend and we didn't talk about sex.

I wash, clean and make food.

The roots are growing slowly but the plant is still small.
She starts more and more talking about one of our neigbours. How friendly he is. I am not really responding on her small talk.
Yesterday we had sex. She was horny and wanted to fuck. I penetrated her and she told me to fuck her "good". Of course I can't and I came too quick.
She was a little pissed. A couple of minutes later she started to masturbate and wanted to hear from me how another man was fucking her. She came quickly again.
There is something going on in her mind. Her fantasy is slowly going in the right direction.
I think it's time to frustrate her. She never answered my question, how it is as woman, to become fucked good.
But she told me she missed it.
I started teasing her if she even can remember how it is because it must already more then 20 years ago.
That question irritated her. I think I found a little weak point I can tease and frustrate her with......