asehpe
Member
Posts: 178
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You can never know that you possess someone's heart; maybe this is even impossible. Being vanilla doesn't really take the risk away, as the number of divorces show. It's not even simply that Brenda might fall in love with another guy and leave Rick; it's also possible that Rick might fall in love with another woman and leave Brenda. I know, this seems impossible now but I wouldn't exclude any possibility.
In the end, as long as both people are strong and love themselves so that they can survive even losing each other, I think it's OK.
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asehpe
Member
Posts: 178
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I am curious about one thing, though, txperv. If you say Brenda really was in love with David, but still broke up with him, doesn't that mean that she wasn't really in love with him? That the feelings and emotional connection she had with David were different that the ones she shared with you? And in this case, was it really love?
I know that feelings can be strange, that love comes in many packages, styles, and intensities, and that it has different sources and varies through life. Still, I wonder... Women (in my experience) are often wired (be it nature or nurture, or both) to try to have their "sexual partner" also be their soulmate. The fact that Brenda separates them; that sexual encounters, including also what you even call "love" for her lovers, doesn't make her look at them as potential soulmates; that I find interesting.
Again, we never know the future. In your case, I understand your commitment to Brenda, which I appreciate and understand. (I am myself married, very much in love with my wife, and so committed to her that I am even willing to make the sacrifice of not being a cuckold, because this lifestyle has zero attractive power for her; so, my love is so strong, I'm even willing to put up with her faithfulness to me :-) I suppose the only path which would lead to you falling in love with another woman is if Brenda somehow willingly broke your heart and destroyed the relationship herself.
But I like to think that we, as humans, can be strong; that we can dare to enter into strange, non-trivial, non-mainstream relationships precisely because we are rocks to ourselves, that we can manage to surface (mostly) unbrowniehed at the other side should something go wrong. That usually goes through loving yourself as much as you love your partner.
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sweetdaddy
Member
Posts: 192
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Hi Rick,
I have been reading your posts with great interest. You are such a lucky man/husband (I know that you are aware of your luck). This is the marital life I have been dreaming of for my beloved wife and I. However, this would never be possible, as I know my wife would never accept that lifestyle (not that I have not tried...)
All I can say is good luck. Please keep us posted on the developments.
Everything is better in black and white
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sweetdaddy
Member
Posts: 192
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Hi Rick,
I have been reading your posts with great interest. You are such a lucky man/husband (I know that you are aware of your luck). This is the marital life I have been dreaming of for my beloved wife and I. However, this would never be possible, as I know my wife would never accept that lifestyle (not that I have not tried...)
All I can say is good luck. Please keep us posted on the developments.
Everything is better in black and white
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