Advice please.....nearly there.....

Hi,
some years ago I realised that I had slight cuck tendancies, in that I wasnt interested in being humiliated, but I definitely wanted my very bi curious girlfriend (now my wife) fucked good and hard by other people. Before me she had indulged in lots of sex and a 3some with friends.
I have worked very hard to convince her that being shared is good for us, and she has tried to attract 2 ex lovers to start her off. One was now very married and not free, the other hasnt got back to her.( he must be nuts)
She is 43, 5'8 very pretty, not overweight, tanned and all my mates say gorgeous.
I dont want to ruin all my hard work, but since her dissapointment (and mine) I have eased off so as not to pressure her.
Now I want to re kindle our interest, without applying for a strange bull toturn upand serve her.....any ladies with advice or guys come to that very gratefully received.
Thanks....eeny.....frustrated as hell!!!