Cuckold fantasy

I used to fantasise about sharing my wife with other men. I think I viewed this as a voyeuristic rather than a submissive act. Then my wife committed adultery, making me a cuckold and, after the event, using my interest in her having sex with other men as her justification. But the whole point for me was to share by givining her to another man and watching them have sex. Though the affair ended after a few months the adultery hurt and even many years after the event I still can't get the image of his cock sliding in and out of her out of my mind and would still like to see it happen for real. The big difference now is that I also fantasise about being used and used by both of them. My fantasy is no longer voyeuristic it is submissive.

Has anyone else's fantasy been morphed by reality?

Now that you've finally figured out you're submissive you can admit it to your wife and get started.

Interesting thoughts Masters_1950.

But does anyone know what is really going on in the deepest recesses of our brains? I regard myself as a dominant alpha male cuckold - a kind of voyeur and "arranger of situations". There is a certain power in arranging situations and releasing the slut within a woman.

But just occasionally i get a pang of real hurt - and I realize that perhaps it's all a charade, a deception I have been playing on myself. Perhaps deep down I believe that I can't really control anything, or secure the certain faithful love of a woman, so I play a game where there is less chance of being hurt.

Perhaps it started when a chick I had a crush on in high school got gang banged, before I had a chance to ask her out - o perhaps it has deeper existential origins. None of us actually have much control over anything - so perhaps cuckoldry is a way of formally showing the white flag.

I'm also someone with an 'alpha' life and relatively dominant role in the bedroom in our relationship, but have always had strong urges in the hotwife/cuckold arena (like, 100% of my masturbation fantasy). I had one experience that made me face some sort of reality when I approached my wife for sex after coming home from work on a day when an acquaintance and former neighbor had been doing a paint job on the ceiling of our bedroom. I know it sounds like the set up for a cheap 10 minute porn scene, but this is actually true. Anyway, she was a little resistant but caved in the end, and when I went down on her it was obvious, like really obvious, that she had been recently fucked. Her pussy was completely soaked and very salty. So, there I was sucking on her clit for all I was worth, as usual, and at the same time trying to process the fact that it was kind of obvious she had just had sex with another guy. Although she knows I have these fantasies and we discuss it ever few months as part of our pillow talk, we've never talked about this day (and I doubt we ever will; I actually am not interested in challenging our basic relationship status over whatever happened between them years ago).
darslangly

This topic of being alpha male in everyday life and having cuckold tendencies is very intriguing. It's a paradox. Surely being red-reded would make you get off on fucking other women? So why does the thought (or reality) of watching your wife with another male (and especially a cock inside her) cause such an arousal?

Surely there must be some deep Darwinian sub-conscience activity going on. I really don't see myself as subordinate in everyday life. In my case, I am about as Type A as you can get: Entrepreneur, extroverted, flirtatious, confident, good body, etc etc.. (not to sound full of it, but I am definitely not a wimp/pussy dude).

I have had the opportunity to fuck over 30 women in the past 15 years being in the lifestyle (Who knows how many actually...) But when I jerk off, what fantasy comes to mind? Not a single scene involving old lovers... its all about my wife fucking someone else. Is that common with everyone on this site?

Actually, on a side note: She has met a new single guy who is new to the lifestyle. We tried something for the first time last Sunday - she had a date and met up with him at the local restaurant while I took care of everything at home. She was out about 2 hours with him, and I wasn't sure if she would come home alone or with him. In the end, she came home alone... the whole evening was an unreal turn on. Normally we go out as a couple and I would be "deal maker". But she disclosed that she wanted to try and have a 'single girl' date because she felt she wasn't in control with me directing traffic. She wanted to have the option to go/no-go on the evening.

For the alpha guys who usually play choreographer: This is an unbelievable exercise in restraint and a much appreciated gift - my sweetheart came home wet as ever and we fucked non-stop all night talking about her evening, even though she didn't fuck him.

We have set a date for next Monday night at our place. She whispered in my ear an hour ago that she wants to undress him. He is a marathon runner, so very lean body. She is so intrigued about his cock.. she has no idea what shape or size he is.

Anyway.. this will be a long week waiting for the big night...

I don't see how it is a paradox in any way. It seems like elementary psychology to me. Those whose real everyday life is spent in menial labor (scrubbing floors, cleaning toilets, hauling trash, etc.) and/or being ignored, used, treated with contempt and generally disrespected by society are not likely to be interested in an escapist fantasy that involves more of the same. Only those with privilege, power, authority, dignity, and respect in society can escape into disempowerment, emasculation, and offense. If disempowerment, emasculation, and offense is your daily life, then it is no escape.

Actually, all the psych studies of masochism (including cuckolding) show that it is exactly that - a phenomena of the successful, privileged, and powerful.
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

Very enlightening response, MrsBlackBlowupDoll

So following on this thread, I wonder how the level of excitement compares between bulls and the cuckolded husbands? Assuming a stereotypical bull has little emotional connection to the wives they fuck, do they get anywhere near the same level of intense pleasure? Of course they would assert they get huge enjoyment from fucking...but my guess is that an anonymous fuck is pretty boring..

I suspect that many of the so-called bulls that are actually fucking the wives in fact have an emotional connection, essentially an open affair with the blessing of the husband. That would be a requirement for my wife because she gets little pleasure from fucking a stranger, no matter how well-endowed he may be.

I would be interested to hear how many couples actually engage in transactional sex.. e.g., meet, greet, fuck, wave goodbye.

MrsBlackBlowupDoll,
I have a degree of power in every day life because I am a BIG permisterality. But it is NOT offense or disempowerment that I seek from cuckolding. I have never lost a girl to sex. In other words, my hold over has never been destroyed by allowing someone else to fuck her. And I am not physically threatening or anything like that - I am just a big permisterality, and women become fixated on me.

This site, with all its whimps and talk of weakness and offense is a constant frustration to me because I am simply not like that. I have read the pschological analyses of the execs who want bondage and discipline - and I am definitely not like that.

Pennpals,
You seem just about the closest to me in attitude I have ever encoutered -but not the same. In my other role as the bull I have gained immense satisfaction from fucking wives, and more so when the husband wasn't consensual or didn't know about it. There are a lot of dimensions to that satisfaction too!

I look at it as sort of Halloween, you get a chance to act or dress out of the ordinary. In our cuckold roles we do things that we would never do in every day life. People that know my wife or I would never think we are who we are in the cuckolding mind set. It is so erotic all three of us to act freely without the need to worry about responsibility to the social norm. I know my wife lets herself go to her bull like no one else, and I get lost in total presentation. I have to admit that I do have moments of mixed feelings at times. It is a little frightening how far I will go or be pushed in that presentation.

I know at moments it plays with my wife's thinking too. But all in all we have a great time and always go back for more. In fact tonight we are at it again. It will be interesting to see where it goes. I love the mixed feelings I have right now, not knowing if it will be a sit and watch, or an evening of them pushing my limits of presentation. I would prefer the pushing the limits off the edge. What a sub whore I am lol. I do know I will be eating out tonight and loving it.

Before our cuckold play we were into heavy B/D and it would appear that I will be subbing it as the wife has told me to be in leather bondage gear tonight when she gets home. She left instructions to shave clean and put on a cock cage when she left for work. She has put out cuffs, leather jock strap, collar, hood and chaps in the play room. I work from home and am not getting a thing done today. I love the feelings of the unknown and the fact that she will be giving herself and or me to a big cock tonight.

Well, they pushed my limits and it was HOT!!!! Life is good!

Hmmm... seems simple to me in my mind. i grew up watching porn stars. i want to continue and she is the star? idk thats how i see it. also i have noticed the factor of adrenealine like skydiving... could be a chem addiction?

I'm not alpha, nor am I a wimp in my real world. In my sex life, I've been a cuck and a bull. My turn on is a woman that has sex with other men or cheats. There is definitely a huge rush fucking a married woman, whether she fucks her husband or not. Some have had permission, some didn't. Rarely did I have sex while the husband was there. While I would love to be able to fuck other women, I'm more than willing to give that up to get my g/f to cuck me. At the moment she doesn't seem to have much interest in it. But there is also a huge thrill being a cuck. It's hot seeing/knowing your woman is one of those sexy sluts I use to fuck. All my fantasies are cuck related.

lovestoshare72
yup - can relate to all of that!

I can associate with that thought. Due to my shiftwork, my wife developed a seperate social life. Knowing what men are like in the presence of a lone married woman, I was well aware that my wife would get chatted up. She is comfortable in the presence of men and in her short skirts and low-cut tops, I felt it only a matter of time before she would give in to temptation.

By giving her my permission and approval to fuck other guys, I avoid the fear of her cheating on me. I told her that I would not be upset if she had sex with new men as long as she came home and told me. It was the lies and deception I wanted to avoid and she understood that. I don't consider my wife is being unfaithful - we call it her being "naughty" and that works for us.
Peter C

For us it started with watching my hotwife flirt and tease our guests at our little country resort. I explained that some of these men would ge the wrong impression of her flirting. She told me then..about 25 yrs ago, not to worry, as she knew what she was doing ...and loved men. As I watched her flirt and tease I became incredibly turned on by it all, to the point of encouraging her to take her flirting a bit further with certian guests. She did take it further but very discretly. I became addicted to it all as did she. Living in the north country of MN we didn't have too much to chhose from so play time was not very frequent, but took every opportunity that came along.
I too am a Dominant man in business and daily life, but totally submitt to my hotwife sexually. For me it's turning over the power and decision making and just having to do as she demands. Even though she was a shared wife for many years, it was about 3 years ago it became a true cuckold relationship, and we've never been happier. She has had a ltr bull in the past, and looking for another one now and perhaps a live-in bull/lover for her/us while I travel for business. She needs cock 24/7 and now travels herself for the right men to fuck for as long as she wants too, then brings me the cummy rewards. We are a 52/51 yo couple, and her insatible nymphomaniac needs grow stronger almost daily.

We are not into extreme offense play, but she becomes wild when she can Dominate a man/mmen or to share in Doming me with a lover. The other suprise is her disire to see me service her bull/lovers...I would have never thought she would be so turned on bi it...We just enjoy sex, the erotic part of it all and in meeting new men for her to fuck. We still have our "resort" and are welcoming new guests all the time.
Mncuckcple