Encouraging my wife "to fall in love with him"....playing with fire

She does have awesome tits, but you are likely to lose her.

I had this talk with my wife recently. She doesn't feel that she can ever love two people. So if we went down that road she'd likely have to make a choice at some point. Due to the lust that is created in a new relationship i'm about 90% guaranteed to be on the loosing side, even with a kid...

cant wait to hear more

I'm wondering how the "fuck Daddy ASAP" will play out in this. On the one hand, rules and boundaries of any kind help to ground the relationship and act against her drifting off. Also the rule means you will maintain a physical intimacy and not be "out of sight out of mind" when it comes to sex. But on the other hand, will this obligation come to seem a burden and a buzzkill to her with the result that she will identify you as the proverbial "ball and chain" holding her back from what she wants. It could be that you end up like the custodial parent in many divorces - the one who makes the kid eat their veggies and do their homework while the step takes them for movies and ice cream. He does what they want to do together, but you require her to "fuck Daddy ASAP" whether she feels like it or not or else risk a lot of domestic turmoil. Doesn't sound like you are winning any points with that.
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

I have loved two at one time, I'll explain. See I love my hubby,he is my best friend and I feel total comfort with him, I can tell him anything at all, honesty and devotion are a staple in out relationship, sex is not. Hubby is gay, he loves me making him wear panties, lingerie, keeping him in chastity, teasing him and degrading him, which I am comfortable doing because him being this way really disgust me in the sense he can not be the man I need in our sexual relationship, although he is so sensetive to my needs and feelings otherwise. He is a dream to live with and is seen by others even our youngren the man of the house. One of my lovers from a while back also won my herat in much the same ways being concious of my feelings, and needs both in and out of the bedroom. I could talk to him about anything, be honest and comfortable with him. We sis date, were seen by others in our circle of friends dating and some knew of our relationship. I even included hubby in our sex to clean me and my lover, as well as being our servant and fluffer. Although I loved him for very different reamisters, they were much the same reamisters I loved hubby. I guess hubby was more like a girlfriend (as I am BI) and my lover was much the man I needed.
I have finally decided to take control (total) and have sissy in panties daily lock sissy in her CB 6000s for good. No more feeling sorry after a few weeks and no more giving into her pleas for mercy! Welcome the NEW MISTRESS!

How has the fire been going?

If she falls in love with him you'll lose her (and those fantastic tits) for sure. I brought up wife sharing to mine 5 years ago, and although we've had some very interesting adventures in and out of the bedroom, she has never done anything more than slow dance with one guy and share a short kiss with another. Both times she said that she was doing it mostly for my benefit although it did turn her on also. A couple of month ago we were having a few takes at home and Gina told me about a guy she met at work and how he had flirted with her and asked her to have a take with him. I told her that I would be perfectly fine with her taking things to the next level if she wanted to go out with him. Here was our conversation after that:

Gina: Do you really, really mean that, because this time I might actually do it.
Me: Yea, I'm fine with it. That would be fantastic!
Gina: So I could have sex with him if i wanted to?
Me: Of course!
Gina: If I have sex with him I might start to develop feelings for him beyond lust.
Me: I could understand that, and if you wanted him to be like a boyfriend instead of just a fuckbuddy then I think I could deal with it.
Gina: Are you sure? What if those feelings turned into love? I can only love one permister at a time, so if I fell in love with him I wouldn't be in love with you anymore.
ME: Whoa there, I don't want you in love with another guy, I just want you to be able to screw another guy if you want to and I want to watch.
Gina: I know how I am, so I think we better just keep this in fantasyland.
She then got on her knees and gave me a *******er blowjob

I think that husbands with wives that can separate sex from emotional attachment are very lucky and I wish mine could do the same. If she could, I'd do anything to keep her. It seems to me that the wife falling in love with the other guy is a risk you take with this lifestyle, but to encourage her to fall in love with another guy? That sounds just crazy and stupid to me. I think you are like a have addict. You want the next high to be more intense than the last and you're not seeing the danger you are setting yourself up for. In my opinion the both of you need to take a break and assess your relationship. Good luck!

Be careful all of you- she will fall in love if she's sweet gal and never been with alot of men- read my book -= it tells this in truth!
d.hart

I respectfully (truly, respectfully) disagree. Many people love or have loved (and I mean romantic love including sexual intimacy) more than one other person at a time. That is the very definition of polyamory. It seems to me that different people see and experience love in different ways. Many fall in love easily, for others it is a gentle growing over time. Many fall out quickly and others can never get over it (and there is no guarantee that those easy in are easy out or those slow to accept are as slow to move on). Some people need to have just one, others can love many simultaneously. What's more, people change depending on the moment of their life and the others involved in these relationships, so even people who think they are by nature a "one man woman" can find that they aren't anymore (and vice-versa of course).

I know in my life poly people, and I know people who thought they were poly but then weren't when it came to one person, or others who thought they never could be but learned later they could. The point is there is nothing "for sure" about how she will feel or act that can be discerned even by herself let alone to strangers like us.

And it is not just love. Even if he loses her love, he might not lose her friendship and companionship. Marriage and pair bonding is not and never has been just about love (many would say it isn't even primarily about love).


I agree it is a risk. In fact, I think it is one of the the risks that defines the kink; cuckolding is the eroticizing of exactly this fear. The question is how much risk are you comfortable with? It sounds like lookin4fun08888 is comfortable with a great deal of it. That makes him a bold gambler, but not necessarily a heedless or obsessed one. Your counsel that he and his wife assess very clearly the risks and weigh them against the rewards is wise. But in the end there will be those who take the risk with informed consent and I say to them "go for it."
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

what a dumn fuck

I think you mean dumb, with a b. I agree, the bull was a dumb fuck treating her that way. I have noticed this is not so unusual. I have come to think it is something about the kind of man who is attracted to being a bull. I think many of them have a difficult time committing and consequent tendencies to behave in a c-h-i-l-d-i-s-h-l-y diffident manner towards women.

Anyway, lookin4un08888 I hope you guys do keep looking to keep things fresh. You sound like a great couple and you shouldn't suffer bed-death. I appreciate that it happens even to cuckolding couples. What's the deal with the current playmate? Is it an understanding that can't be evolved further into something more risky and exciting for you? If it is, maybe it is time for her to start looking/dating in earnest for a boyfriend. Not a lover, mind, but a boyfriend, with all the squishy romantic, dating that involves. (If not, get evolving. Forget an overnight - how about she spend the next week's vacation off romantically with him and not you?)

On another note, your interest in cucking seems to be very risk driven - specifically the risk of her falling for someone. Have you considered other dimensions of risk in your play? Maybe it would help get you charged if you risked people finding out about your lifestyle or other humiliating things? Just a thought.

Good luck, and please keep us posted.
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

Early in our relationship, my wife and I agreed that falling in love was one right one could never give up, no matter how much they might say otherwise. It's a most unremovable permisteral freedom. You can't give it up if you want to, because you could still fall in love, as many in fact do. Yet we wanted to "do life, for better and worse" as partners, no matter what. Poly lifestyles aren't for everyone, it requires more relationship efforts/s*******s/habits than most are willing to invest, other reamisters aside. But it worked well for us, and in the decades of happy life we spent together, only her death came between us.
Be the different drummer.

While I do know a couple of polyamorist people, they are truly rare, and they just experience love differently than others. I agree with everyone else. When someone who has been in a long term relationship, especially one with youngren, that relationship tends to become the standard for 'love.' Asking her to fall in love is asking to be replaced. I think eventually she would have to make a choice.


I agree with this. It could really blow up on you.


I don't see how any sort of trusting, regular, cuckold relationship would work when one party knows the other is using their youngren as 'hostages' in case of bad behavior. I find this antithetical to the very idea of a cuckold relationship....
Feel free to contact by e-mail or MSN/Se sentir libre de me contacter par mail ou MSN

I think this is right, and thanks for sharing you painful experience as a cautionary tale. The problem is that the level of actual risk varies from couple to couple, as does their tolerance for it and willingness to pay the consequences. Some risks aren't worth it, but each individual needs to decide for themselves which ones are and aren't for them.


Well said. In point of fact millions of married people who never dreamed of cuckolding and never thought of themselves as poly find themselves falling in love with a third person every single day. I think the point is, however, that there are "risk factors" (if you'll pardon the usage) to falling in love and the question is how wise it to increase these for your partner. It is a bit like heart disease. There are factors that increase risk, but every individual's risk is different based on all sorts of factors. Some people need to be more cautious regarding the factors under their control then others. Some are lucky enough that they can ignore those. Some are not so lucky, but choose to ignore them because they think other things are more important to them. (So some people would rather eat a big steak covered in salt every day and risk a shorter life than go without, for instance.)


This may or may not be true (I've never found reliable data to back it up - and I've looked) but we should not ignore a larger possibility, which is that everybody is capable of experiencing love in any number of ways depending on the people and situations they find themselves in. As you imply, much of how we regard love is societally conditioned. I think we sell people short if we say that they are not among the "truly rare" elect who able to transcend convention. It seems fairer to say that it is a challenging thing to do. (Not that it is clear to me that that is what he would want, anyway.)
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

Great to see an update. "Will she leave me,?????"...well, can you imagine her coming home one day, telling you that only he will be cumming in her pussy from now on, Oh, and that she needs you to move some of her stuff over to his place. She will be staying with him more often. Don't worry, she will still come over to have you do her laundry...you can sniff her dirty panties.

duckandbunny79
I am sorry duckandbunny79, I have to disagree. The woman would want to please both her men and would simply do her best to please them both each in their own ways. It can be done and is done probably more so than you or I know of. Cheers, mjb0007bond

I totally believe that a woman can love more than one man. Mine fell in love with a guy and still would be fucking him if his wife hadn't found out. We both miss him. I think also that in a way the cuck can also fall in love with the man fucking his wife.

I totally believe that a woman can love more than one man. Mine fell in love with a guy and still would be fucking him if his wife hadn't found out. We both miss him. I think also that in a way the cuck can also fall in love with the man fucking his wife.

my wife has had a 'steady' boyfriend for 5 years or so and she openly talks of her love for him and she has no problem telling him that she loves him when they speak on the phone,
i encourage my wife to 'fall in love' with some of her bulls, it allows her to have a deep relationship, she is comfortable being very intimate with him and she can orgasm with deep kissing.
i would welcome a 'bull' taking a greater part in our lives, would be happy giving up my bed just to have the opportunity to be a better cuckold servant....

My wife and I talk every time we have sex about her taking on a lover. To date, she has been on a few dates but she has not gone further.

I am aware of the dangers...my wife has warned me on numerous occasions that there is no guarantee she will not fall for a lover. Despite this, all I can think about is her finding a stud who can satisfy her in bed...her getting addicted to sex with him and the passionate feelings develop between them. I have not admitted this to her but I am quite sure she knows I get off on these thoughts...

I cum hard thinking about these ideas at least once a day if not more.

How'd the talk go? Its very exciting reading what i've been thinking about for a while now.

lookin4fun08888,

Thanks for keeping us abreast. Your situation seems absolutely delightful. I am very impressed with your relationship that you were able to make it a choice of 'be more open to him emotionally or stop fucking him.' My wife and I are pretty open but I'm not sure I could have ever given that ultimatum, no matter how gently. It seems to me you are living a little slice of heaven right now and you have my best wishes for its improvement. You probably don't need to be reminded, but just because she opens herself to love in that direction doesn't mean it will find her. I truly hope for you it does. But as you say, it is a great ride either way. Thanks again for letting us all share it with you vicariously.
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

Sorry to hear lookin, I think your fantasy and actions on this are a totally hot idea. The guy is honestly a fool for not jumping into it. By your wife's pic she is a total hottie and I think the idea that she is falling in love with another man with the possibility of leaving you is a hot idea for sure. I agree with you when you say to each their own because that is honestly how it is. You know the risks and it is what makes it an amazing ride.

I'm so sorry to hear that. My wife and I had almost the same experience. The guy was all about seducing her and they were doing great - she really fell for him hard. Then he started to back away. I don't think it was her and I don't think it was because we were married, I think he had an issue. His own wife had left him not that long before and it became easy to see why - this was not a guy who was very good at putting his partner high on his priorities. He always had something he "had to do" about work, community, other family, hobbies, etc. I just think he was bad a relationships. I think that was why he pursued a married woman (he did not know I was accepting when he started.)

Unfortunately, it really chilled my wife on things for a while. It was clear that, although he said he was fine and open to it, he never got his head around the notion of it being OK for her to do this. She was hurt and instinctually protected herself for a while.

The good news is that she came out of it eventually, and after a year or so was very open again to falling in love. I'm sure with a little space, you're wife will be ready to climb in the saddle again too.

Good luck.
Pantalone, Wittol, oblate, abnegator, fellator, pathic, irrumatiophile,fop, epicene, cotquean, skivvy, thrall, and pilgarlic.

This is a great thread. Its nice to see deeper thoughts not just cream pies and little dicks. My story has some similarities. I would love to email, PM, skype or Yahoo with you or any one similar situations or history.





Here is my story. If you plan on judging me keep it to yourself. I am already in the situation and there is no going back.

My wife and her Boyfriend/Lover/Bull(he was all three...true greatness!) stop seeing each other three years ago in August. Recently I suspected they might be still seeing each other. IMO they did initially break it off but somewhere along the line have rekindled.

For the worse my marriage has never been the same. Yet still I am a burning cuck. There are a lot of reamisters it didn't work. Mostly I was a poor excuse for a cuck! I was selfish and impatient. Also unsure of my own desires. We had youngcare issues. He is married and had limited availability. Which my wife would often drop everything to go to him even the kids on some level. IMO she had the right to he was worth it and the kids were with me not at a sitter or anything like that. The final reamister for the break up is my wife being an awful communicator. Even she would admit it. Not a good idea to try this type of marriage right? Agreed but what is done is done.

As I mentioned my marriage has never been the same. the final date was the three of us on his boat swimming takeing beers on the river. It was a beautiful day. By this point they had been dating for over a year. And they were the couple. I as the mutual friend.

The first half of the day on the boat was wonderful. They were the couple....I was just sort of there. They treaded water naked together in each others arms kissing while I as on the boat. When I went in the water they went in the boat. When privacy allowed she sucked him in the boat. All the while just relaxing and enjoying the day.

The last highlight of the day was when I finally gave into one of my cuck desires. I asked for a pic of us side by side to show what a perfect man cock he had compared to mine. He and my wife happily agreed....for no reamister in particular the shot got taken by my wife with his camera and I never got the picture. Shortly after they disappeared over the dunes for a fuck in the sand...everything was great right? By the time they returned...I BLAME IT ON MY SUCKING DOWN ABOUT THREE BEERS! I was a grumpy buzz*******. The rest of the day they continued t do their thing but the beer got the best of me. By the end of the day there was no mistaking what a jerk I was. On the way home my wife and I fought. More like I had tantrum.

After the tantrum we agreed to end it with him. To this day it has never been discussed further. Obviously she resented that it ended and she lost him. I resented her not soothing me and communicating me but why would she I was 100% in the wrong. Her poor communication part of the marriage. It is one of my assumed responsibility to start communication when things get sticky. Everything from domestic to financial to whatever issues. I am fine with that but in this situation I let it fester and fester and fester. Three years later I am still a cuck.

The marriage is at a crossroads. Three years has worn both of us down. Divorced has been discussed. resentment has been discussed. Everything under the sun has been discussed except the day on the boat.

She is leaning towards divorce or at least talking it. I am of the mind that with or without cuckolding marriage is forever. And with kids a family is even more forever. This is the next discussion. My argument is if she wants a divorce then she will have to go get it. I wont be an ass but I won't agree to the divorce until a court of law says so. I plan on letting her that my resentment is over and that no matter how stubborn or bitchy she is I am going to sweet, kind, loving and patient.

I also plan on bringing up the boat and her lover. Since that day three years ago there have been other issues but that day is a no doubt benchmark. It will be interesting to see if she agrees when we talk about it. For anyone thinking I am crazy it is to the point of nothing to lose.

I see this going in one of three ways.
A. Talking about the boat eases her resentment. My apology gives her a chance to see the truly important things...ie a family our youngren and all that entails...her Boyfriend becomes a mute issue in rear view mirror. The family survives cuckolding does not.
B. My apology about her Boyfriend gives her a chance to see the truly important things and come out about wanting to or alredy being involved with her Lover. The family survives as does cuckolding. Her relationship with him comes back out in the open and with my full and complete support love and lust flourish
C. bringing up long dead and forgotten issues has no impact or makes the marriage worse thus wearing me down further and accelerating the divorce process.

She and the kids are heading to in laws maybe she will come back with papers for all I know. Just joking. I am 95% sure that wouldn't happen but anything is possible. I do not want to have a half a talk then she leaves for 5 days. Sometime next week for "the talk."

As I mentioned earlier please save the judgmental bullcuckolds brownie!

Otherwise I would love to relive the past with other cucks into more than cream pies and little dicks.

Also appreciate advice on topic and will share my own experiences to help other cucks.

My first question seeking advice is should I start my own thread. I would prefer to do email or PM but maybe I should start a thread.

the best email addy is - [email protected]. Also Yahoo IM. [email protected]. Have never Skyped but want to.

His great cock! My Wifes hand! Our wedding ring!

Its me Tony. So if you think you are the man from Shannons past. I miss what we had! I hope your still seeing her and not missing a thing!

He's a douche bag??? for what? Not wanting to fall in love with a woman that you totally control on your terms. I think we need to put this in perspective. The cuckold thing is way out there for most people. It's not even close to a normal thing. Sure, he wants some free pussy, and he's taking advantage of the situation, but even though he's fat and ugly, he's not perverted. Certainly not crazy enough to fall in love with a woman that's has a husband that's "okay" with it and is writing the rules from the sidelines. That's nuts.

I get the whole turn on of the scenario. Trust me, I feel it brother. But I'll be damed if my lovely (and I do mean HOT) wife is going to fall in love with anyone else. Because overriding my fetish is something called wisdom.

You state she may not come back, but oh well, at least it was a great ride. These words can't possibly come from a man that is in love with his wife. My wife and I have had brushes with this lifestyle, and the sex is just unbelievable. Vanilla people could never understand it, but it's out of this world. I have enough wisdom to overide my cock and see where this road would end. Our relationship is a whole lot deeper than a great fuck.

I am in a similar situation. My marriage has been poor for 3 years. Since we called it off with her Boyfriend/Lover/Bull.

Long story short we have recently discussed divorce and I wonder if the best way to save the marriage is to reunite her with him.

I am also hoping she is secretly seeing him, really cheating on me behind my back which is 100% my fault if she and I will happily apologize to both of them on my hands and knees for being the reamister they had to sneak around.
Its me Tony. So if you think you are the man from Shannons past. I miss what we had! I hope your still seeing her and not missing a thing!

@ Pervyperv, go for it, do everything you can to keep your wife. Open up and tell her you desperately want her to be with her lover again. The fact you acted bad on the boat is something that she has to calculate into it. Jealousy, although very arrousing to us, is a very strong emotion that can even make a cuck go mad sometimes. Everybody deserves a second chance. You could ask her her wishes and do your utmost best to fulfill them and be the good cuck you can an want to be.

A 2nd chance would be a dream cum true.
Its me Tony. So if you think you are the man from Shannons past. I miss what we had! I hope your still seeing her and not missing a thing!

Rootin' for ya pervyperv