Cuckold Jokes. Three guys die...

Usually when one of my wifes friends is told about our relationship; that I get off on my wife openly fucking other men...well I get a few of these jokes sent to me. Thought it might be nice to have a collection of jokes. Isn't there one of mainstream cuckold movies.


Three guys die and end up at the gates of heaven, talking to St. Peter.

So, Peter asks the first guy, “How many times did you cheat on your wife?”

“None. I had a perfect marriage.”

Great, says Peter. You get to cruise around heaven in a Viper.

And you, how many times did you cheat on your wife?
“Only twice, I think,” says the second guy.

Okay. You get to cruise around heaven in a Cadillac.

And you, how many times did you cheat on your wife?
“12 times. Maybe 13,” says the third guy.

Okay, says Peter. You get a rusty Ford. Later that day, the guy in the Cadillac sees the guy in the Viper crying.

What’s wrong?

I just saw my wife.

So?

She was riding a skateboard.

Sam and Becky are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. Sam says to Becky, “Becky, I was wondering - have you ever cheated on me?”

Becky replies, “Oh Sam, why would you ask such a question now? You don’t want to ask that question…”

“Yes, Becky, I really want to know. Please…”

“Well, all right. Yes, 3 times…”

“Three? Well, when were they?” he asked.

“Well, Sam, remember when you were 35 years old and you really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give you a loan? Remember, then one day the bank president himself came over the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?”

“Oh, Becky, you did that for me! I respect you even more than ever, to do such a thing for me. So, when was number 2?”

“Well, Sam, remember when you had that last heart attack and you were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Then remember how the doctor came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then you were in good shape again?”

“I can’t believe it! Becky, you should do such a thingfor me, to save my l ife. I couldn’t have a more wonderful wife. To do such a thing, you must really love me darling. I couldn’t be more moved. So, all right then, when was number 3?”

“Well, Sam, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short..?”

A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, She relaxs with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?" "Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry's bar?"