sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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sb,
Have you thought why you're still not comfortable with the feminization? I still think it's the gay sex. I still recommend a m4m massage. Have you thought about that? It's seems like you're just letting your wife lead you.
sfd
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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SFD, i think thats the whole point, she is leading me, thats the way it is and the way it will be and on balance the way I wnat it to be too. Whilst I dont love the femminization, I am not hating it anymore and its worth it, as I love the rest of the changes to our marriage and life. I love the feeling of being cucked, I love it when shes out having a great time and when she is getting the enjoyment that I was incapable of offerring her.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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sb
OK, but have you talked to her about where she led you that ended up being almost r-a-p-e, without opportunity to slowly workout your inhibitions toward sex with men?
sfd
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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sb,
This event gave her what she was looking for to fully de-masculinize you in her mind. It certainly didn't let you, in your mind, work into your new role.
Women and men learn about sex through a process, usually as teenagers. First, looking at eyes, then holding hands, then kissing, then petting, etc.
sfd
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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SFD, Jenn and I have discussed that night and we both agree that it couldnt have happendd in a better way. Why put off the inevitable, what would the point have been to slowly get there? thats what I am good for, I cant satify a women so at least I can satisfy a man.
Looking back it was a very humiliating experience, but i loved that feeling of total helplessness. To recall Ian saying you have my sperm in you, still sends shivers down my spine.
I fact I must admit, I am hoping that Jenn brings Ian back for another session one day soon.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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sb,
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disrespect your wife. I'm not making my point.
You said (and have said before that you're not totally comfortable with feminization - "mostly I have loved it. Still not totally with the femminization..." I think you're not comfortable with having sex with a man.
How do you feel about being touched by a man? How do you feel about touching a man's penis? How do you feel about sucking a penis? How do you feel about kissing a man? (Kissing is often much more intimate that full sex.) Is any of this repulsive to you? I imagine it is, and I believe that's what's holding up your comfort with feminization. That is my theory - am I wrong? Prove it by trying these things with a man.
sfd
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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SFD, I don't agree. I dont see the femminization at all connected to sex. I have simply not felt right dressing, although I am getting used to it. I did not feel right dressing from the beginning. My wife has said all along that I will learn to love the dressing, I can't say I would agree with her so far, but she has been right with everything else so far.
As for yiur questions about sex with a man, the whole point is I am not the slightest bit attracted to guys, I hve no desire to kiss a guy or in fact do anything sexual with a guy. What I loved was the whole experience froma offense point of view. I am loving being a cuckold, loving the feeling of helplessness and uselessness that comes with that. If Jenn ddint make me, I would never have done it, nor would I do it again, unless she wanted me to.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB,
Thank you for the explanation. I understand that you're not attracted to guys, but does being submissive and humiliated give you euphoria? If not, why are you attraced to cuckolding in the first place?
I was led into gay sex after many years, not because I was attracted to guys, but because I wanted a real life experience of offense and presentation. Putting on lingerie did this, but I sought more - submissive sex. I'm still not attracted to guys, it's the humiliating and presentation that I seek.
You felt something very strong when Brian touched your pantied ass. You were vulnerable by wearing a dress and exposing your ass so that Brian could touch it by merely reaching under your skirt. Women are vulnerable like this when then wear a skirt - it's part of being female.
This is the path you are on - vulnerablity, presentation and offense. It will lead to sex with men, not because you find them attractive, but because you seek the euhporia from the offense and vulnerability. This is the path that AK Remenko describes. Read his stuff - sex with men is inevitable, Jenn has already taken you there and has told you she wants you to have sex with men.
The form of the sex with men is all that's going to change. You experienced penetration - you need to be prepared for much more intimacy. As I said, kissing is much more intimate than penetration. That's why most prostitutes won't kiss their clients.
I believe once you overcome the gay sex barrier, that the feminization resistance will go away. Sex with guys is part of being a woman, and that is the path that you've agreed to go down.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB
You said, "I don't agree. I dont see the femminization at all connected to sex."
You also said,"My wife has said all along that I will learn to love the dressing, I can't say I would agree with her so far, but she has been right with everything else so far."
So have you ever talked to your wife about your total disinterest about having sex with men? You obviously don't agree with my advice, I think you're in a state of denial about where this is leading. Maybe you should ask your wife since you've trusted her predictions.
You are correct about your love of the offense. You just don't yet see where your desire for offense is leading. You said you want to please men since you can't please women. Yet you haven't thought about what pleasing men involves. It's more than just being penetrated. It means being touched, caressed, and stimulated by them. It means kissing them and touching and sucking their cocks. That's what women do. That's the path you're on. Just ask Jenn.
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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SFD. I have discussed this with Jenn at length. She said she has no plans for me to be satisfying men or women. She loved watching me with Ian, and sees that as a neccessary and enjoyable part of our lifestyle, but as she reminded me, the life style we have chosen is about satifying her not me. Sometimes her enjoyment may be enhanced by watching me with one of her lovers ( or anythign she may chose) but its all about her. I cant say I disagree, looking back on the last year it has been quite a ride, I havnt loved all of it, but I love being a cuckold and Jenn is always right.
Btw she is bringing Ian back here tomorrow night, not sure what that means for me.
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Jayj
Member
Posts: 59
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SB please can you tell us more about your femminization? how is that going? are you dressed as a girl all the time at home? have you been out dressed yet? and how is your wardrobe going?
Love your story please keep the updates coming
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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Jay, its coming along. I am dressing a lot of the time at home. Jenn wants to see me femm as much as possible. I have become very good with makeup and kepe myself smooth. I wouldnt sya I love it, but I dont hate it either, I guess you could say I am getting used to. Jeen has not brough up hormones again, but i know she will one day soon. My wardrobe is growing Jenn and I have been shopping on ebay a lot recently.
Thanks for the interest
SB
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB
Have you had more laser treatments? Do you have pierced ears yet? Are you wearing panties and stockings to work every day? Are your eyebrows fem? When do you thing someone at your work will notice? Hiding panty waists forever is very hard.
SFD
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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THE PATH YOU'RE ON
SB,
I may have told you this story, but the posting was probably wiped when I quit the group before.
I corresponded with a guy in Ohio who's wife had femmed him with Femmeyourhubby methods. We was an accountant. She is a successful business permister.
She was open with what she wanted to do to him, as Jenn has been with you. She showed him the femmeyourhubby material and said, this is where I'm going to take you.
She had him start wearing lingerie, etc to work under his men's outer clothing. Within three months, he had lost his accounting job. It's not so hard to understand.
People are very sensitive to gender confusion. When we work with the same people everyday, they begin to notice small things and talk. It's a huge topic for office gosip. Perhaps remnants of makeup or pierced ears, a panty waist exposed when shirt tails are pulled out, straps from a camisole or bra (that's very easy to see) or stocking covered ankles that are sheer unlike men's socks.
So when he lost his job, his wife threw out all his mens cloths and told him he was now the housewife. She brought home the pay check, he did all the housework.
After another three months (six months into the "program"), she brought home a gay guy one night and conviced her husband to suck his cock. Then he started hormones. After another six months (one year into the program), he had developed breasts to the point that he felt he could never return to being a man ever again. They weren't relaxing in the same bedroom, the husband had "her" own fem room. The wife would often "take" her husband's ass with a strap on. She often brought home men to relax with (husband became cuckold). She encouraged her husband to go out to tranny clubs to find a man to bring home for sex with the husband.
The wife would often bring home her girl friends to taunt and tease the femmed husband. The neighbors all saw the husband going to the store fem and knew that "she" was really a guy.
After another year, the wife sent her husband on a week long gay cruise with the instructions that "she" had to pickup and relax with a different gay man every night. The husband often is sent out to pick up men at clubs to bring home for sex.
So this "man" is now a full time housewife. Sleeps alone every night. Is permanently humiliated as a pervert from all the neighbors and their friends. A permanently completely humiliated permister. Some of the neighbor women talk to him. He has some tranny friends. But..........
Completely, permanently humiliated.
Steven, you probably think I'm mean or judgemental of you. That's not at all true. I care about you very much. I'm much like I think you are - we've confused offense for love.
If I sound mean, it's because I want you to fully understand where you could be going. I struggle greatly, but lead a somewhat secret fantasy life that craves offense. I'm in a support group and have pursued recovery and therapy for 15 years.
Your situation could permanently affect your total life, just like it did with the permister in Ohio.
I wish you well Steven.
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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#255 · Edited by: sb64
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SFD thanks for the concern, but all is good. I understand that your friend in Ohio was femminized and hasn't landed up happy, who knows what life has awaiting us.
As for me, work is not an issue, the industry I work in is full of "interesting" people of all sorts, if someone at work were to notice it wouldnt really matter. For example, there is a Post Op women at one of our other branches.
It sounds to me like your friend in Ohio's wife didnt actually have feelings for him. I have done a lot of research about cuckolding & femminization, I am well aware of the risks and the pittfalls. But at the end of the day, I have to trust Jenn, she says she loves me and that we will be together for ever. If you cant trust that then whats the point?
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB,
Thank you for your reply. You have your eyes wide open.
So how are the laser treatments coming? Has this been any embarassment for you with the clinitians running the laser?
What are you wearing to work? Do you think anyone has noticed yet?
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tinydickjohny99
Member
Posts: 28
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so how about an update of whats going on its been awhile
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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quick update, she has popped out to the shops. Laser is good, i have never specially liked body hair. Not embarassed at all. I am wearing normal work clothes, no change except for underneath.
She had Ian over the oher night, he couldnt make it last week. I was unsure what woudl happen, as the last time Ian was over he took my virginity. Jenn made me dress up ina very sexy short skirt and see through top. I had to opne the door and serve them takes. They started getting into each other on the couch, they were kissing and within minutes had his hand up her skirt. They went off to her bedroom whithout saying a word. I wanst sure what would happen. I spent the night in my room, expecting to be called to help clean up, or more, but it didnt happen. I eventually feel arelax fully dresed on my bed and woke up in the mornign to find Ian had gone. Jenn said that they were having such a hot time that they forgot all about me. I have to admit, I was dissapointed and felt quite let down. My feelings suprised even myself, I guess I wanted to feel Ian's hard cock inside me again, I think I need to feel that offenses again. Jeen said mayeb next time.. she was very pleased that I was so keen and rewarded me with a 'girly session' of kissing hugging and rubbing. I had my first orgasm for weeks and my first with her for ages, it felt so good when she rubbed me through my panties and I made a huge mess in les than a minute.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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Steven,
Were you thinking about Ian's big hard cock? Would you have liked to have been on your back with your legs in the air, a pillow under you to let Ian take you, with your legs spead, up in the air, resting on his shoulders? Wouldn't you have felt so vulnerable and submissive? Would you have reached out and touched his cock. Would you have sucked it?
How do these thoughts make you feel? Vulnerable, submissive, humiliated? Isn't that exciting?
Isn't isn't that you're attracked to a man. It's all about feeling submissive in real life. It's about being vulnerable, serving, submissive.
SFD
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB
What's new?
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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And......?
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Little Boy
Member
Posts: 82
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Hello SB64!??!
How ya holding up?
XO
LB
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB
It's been several weeks since we've heard from you. How are you doing?
SFD
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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SB
Are you OK? Are you still here? It's been almost two months since we've heard from you.
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sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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It's a shame that this thread has gone quiet. I hope SB is connected with others in this adventure that his wife is taking him on. He really needs some support. She wanted him to be active in TG sites. I guess this one doesn't qualify.
SFD
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jones1344
Member
Posts: 14
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I know that I have really enjoyed reading this. There are many things that I would like my wife to incorporate into our life, though not all. Like most people, my story is similar yet slightly different.
SB, I hope to hear an update from you.
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sb64
Member
Posts: 150
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Hi everyone
Sorry I have been away so long. I am not allowed on the computer unsupervised because I posted the story here without telling her. She has a password on the computer, but she forgot to log off tonight when she went out with her boyfriend. So here I am.
Not a lot to report, life has settled down into a nice routine. I am Chloe at home and Steve at work. People at work have noticed that I am smooth, they just think I am excentric, I dont care anyway
My Goddess has had a boyfriend for the last few months, she sees him once or twice a week, often at our place. They have actjually gone out for dinner tonight. They let me watch sometimes, but I am not involved.
She did bring a guy home for both of us about a month ago, I must admit I loved being a slut for him. So life is good, I will try keep in touch, thanks for all messages of support and all your concerns.
SB
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bullfluffnswallow
Member
Posts: 509
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#268 · Edited by: bullfluffnswallow
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Quoting: sb64 # Posted: 3 Jun 2008 19:51:15 · Edited by: sb64 Reply Quote Report OMG OMG OMG its happend, where do i start, after the last post telling you about the fist time i watched her with Ian, it was amazingly different to when i watched her with Brian, Then it was like she was in control, and I kinds felt all was fine because of that. It was very erotic and of course she made me swallow a mouthful of Brian's cumm after her blowjob on him. But with Ian it was different, he was in total control, I felt totally helpless and humiliated, he made me play with myself, I have only ever done that once for my wife ever. I have read up an lot about cuckolding, I suspected wheree this was all going to head, I was not sure how or of I was going to be able to handle what was sure to lie ahead some time in the future, but not in a million years did i suspect what happend the next time. So 2 nights ago, Ian came over again. He came in took one look at me and said why are you dressed like that, I want you femminized and now! I said, but my Jenn and I had agreed that i wouldnt have to do that anymore, he said, I am not Jenn, I call the shots now, Gulp, I felt so weak, so pathetic, but yet so compliant, off i went, i shaved, amde myself up and dressed in a shrt skirt and top, I came quietly into the room, they were on the bed, he was pounding into her, she was clucthing , clawing at his back saying Nah, nah nah, yesss baybeeeeeeeeee. I didnt think they noticed me, i sat in the corner, quietly. After some time passed, he clearly came in her, and they lay still. After about 10 minutes he turned to me and said come here bitch. Oh oh, I thought i get to clean her out again, I was getting used to it. I approached the bed, he said to my wife , she looks quite good,I think its time don't you? She said oh yes I think it is well past time. Time for what? I thought OMG, he is going to make me suck him, oh oh oh!! I dont know about that, I doint think i am up for that. get on the bed bitch, I sat down, not like that, climb on the bed. I I im not.. shut it he said, you look like a girl ist time to get fucked like a girl. He said what!!!! OMG No no i said, I am not ready for that. Not ready? ready he said, get on your knees. Baby said my wife you know its time, but I thought, well i knew this day would come one day, but not yet, I havtn even sucked a guy yet, or even touched another mans penis ever. She laughed, another mans??? babygirl do it for me, come on. I didnt know how I felt, I was so mixed up, before I knew it I was on my hands and knees and he was behind me, he lifted my skirt up and pushed my panties aside, he put a blob of something wet and slimy on me and rubbed it. Then I felt his cock pressing at my virgin hole. My wife sat next to me facing him, her face was right next to mine, she said to me, you will love this honey trust me. I just looked at her. Slowly he pushed that big cock into me, the pain was quite something, but he never gave up. What a stud he is she said, see how hard he is even after coming in me. Well it felt as if i were being split in 2, it didnt feel good at all, but he never stopped the pressure, it felt as if I was going to burst, he said I am inside your pussy now, you are no longer a virgin. OMG i didnt know what to think, I was so humiliated, here I was with a guys huge prick up insdie of me, right in front of my wife. I was very uncomfortable, i didnt notice that she was holing my hand and encouraging me gently. It seemd like ages OMG, OMG, OMG i just reread a bunch of this posting and spunked all over myself when i read this de-mannig scene!!!! (See that date for remainder of the tale...it would'nt all fit) i hope one day to have this happen to me,too!!!  Of course, unlike SB, i will have sucked lots of cock already...LOTS   THANK YOU SB for the update, t Who's Your Bitch.single,cuz not man enuf to attract a woman.
Will meet for sissy sex with yor cuck!! |
Little Boy
Member
Posts: 82
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Dear SB64, So nice to hear from you, you little sissy-slut  XO LB |
sillyfemdude
Member
Posts: 121
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Steve
Thank you for the update. How close are you with your wife? Do you feel closer or more isolated than before all this started two years ago.
Best Wishes,
sfd
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